The Library

I thought about all the forum people that I could remember during shacharis this Yom Kippur. It was the best part, as far as I am concerned. It's funny, but there is only one tefillah during which I get a "second wind" and take a ...

For me - in active addiction, staying clean was a religious struggle - that was really all about me. A clean day was another feather in my hat, a good deed, a great mitzva, and - as some here have stated - another feather in th...

Someone wrote on the forum: I am sure that after 120 years, all of us posting on this website will be dancing in the middle of klal yisrael's circle with all the tzadikim, because if we can overcome our Niyonos, we certainly deserve t...

I have not met too many folks who did not have to live any differently to get a different life. Meaning, if you expect to actually have a different and better life, a life without the garbage of the Lust, P, and M-words, you may not be ...

Aaahhh! i hate this! stupid yetzer! i can't take it anymore! i hate this part of me! wasting my time! making me do stupid things! I'm still trying to break my filter! somebody call me stupid! i wasted another hour tonight on no...

Someone wrote: When it gets impossibly hard, all it takes is for me to drop my guard for one stupid second, and I'm a gonner. That's what I really need help with. Dov replies: I understand the "dropping guard for a second" business,...

Not only can't I cure myself from my sickness, but as the Kotzker might say, perhaps neither can G-d Himself, necessarily, for He only comes in where people "let" Him in. The 12 Steps are about letting G-d in, by learning how to get ourselves o...

Someone was complaining how difficult it is to remain clean with lust triggers being everywhere! Dov writes: They may seem like they are everywhere, but we all go through times like that. Thanks for reminding me. I passed the same pretty lady twice yesterday - first at w...

Dov had written once on the forum: "I started getting better because I really reached out for my G-d and kept using His help, from that point forward." Someone asked Dov to clarify: Please help me understand this. How do I do this??? When I am caught ...

I am not an expert on anything, and certainly not on addiction or recovery. (I'm pretty good with wild mushrooms, though!). I am, however, able to share my experience, and I am gifted with the faith that I need to share it in order to remain sober. I became ...

You know, some say that the reason why Shavuos and Shmini Atzeres/Simchas Torah don't have mitzvos like the other holidays is because they are about everything - the whole package deal. A specific mitzva observance would narrow it down, and that would be a...

Someone wrote on the forum: I'm on day 20 and hit a milestone of one of the first periods of nidda that I made it through without falling. You would think I'd be flying high... But I actually had a tough Shabbos. My addiction was causing me to obsess quite a ...

"Nurah B'Amram" calls "FIRE" on the forum! (His nickname and his calling "Fire" is based on a story in the Gemara Kidushin 81a, see Tool #9 of the GYE handbook). Nura writes: I'm coming off a very loooooong project at work, about to wrap it up. I'm bur...

We've all been enjoying a member called "Uri" on the forum lately. His struggle is so real, his wisdom is beyond his years, and his songs have touched a lot of our hearts! Uri is a 20 year old Ba'al Teshuva suffering from this addiction, and having a v...

I know I can't do 90 days!!! I'm not kidding. Nevertheless, it has been 11.5 years of knowing that so far, and still sober. I am not strong, and charts do nothing for me either, but a chevra does, and so do the 12-steps. Life is getting better every year o...

Someone asked Dov: "I never understood why our Higher Power would restore us to sanity. Someone from SA told me it just works and never mind why." Dov Replies: "Wasn't your motive for desperately searching out and drinking in porn, fantasy and masturbation *always* in or...

Someone posted on the forum an excerpt from an article at livescience.com which he says reminds him a lot of the idea that an addict is "powerless" over lust. Here's the excerpt: If you think you're generally good at resisting temptation, you're probably...

Today I want to share some big Yesodos that I learned from Dov. (If anyone has experience with what really works, it's Dov. Once a slave to an all-consuming lust addiction, Dov is now sober for over 18 years! See Dov's story here). It often takes a lot of trying and faili...

My friend, I assume you are taking actions to put the steps into practice in some way in your daily life. You wrote that "something's gotta change". For some folks (like me), I believe it's this: Are these steps just ideas that you accept in your heart? Or... Are they ...

I have a friend who taught me to make it habitual to say "Hi" to Hashem when I get into my car - you know, the way we tend to have a ritual flicking on of the radio? Well, instead of that, flick on REALITY and just say "Hi G-d".... (He didn't know he was "teaching" this t...