The Library

"Helpless" Posts: Deep Breathe.... Here we go: I am torn. Torn to pieces. Shreds. Threads. What is there to do? Another spiral downward. Another dip in the sea of death. Yet another cry from my knees. I don't know what to do anymore. I honestly feel hopeless. Helpless. Al...

Someone asks: My only issues are masturbation and pornography. I never acted out live. Should I join an SA group? Dov Responds: "The only requirement for membership is a sincere desire to stop lusting" - White Book, page something-or-other (amud beis) The question I'd ask...

If whatever I was using lust for is not replaced with something as effective as lust was, I will be left stranded and feel even worse than before. And that is where the Steps come in: the steps (spelled-out in the 12th, if we haven't yet figured it out by then) are specif...

Rabbi Twerski wrote me the other day: A guy calls me today, whether I endorse GuardYourEyes, and I said Yes. Then he asked if their derech was "Daas Torah." I said, "How come you didn't call me to ask whether watching pornography was Daas Torah?" Meschugena world Twerski ...

Someone wrote: Bh I'm still clean, but I don't feel clean. I have practically not been nichshal in two weeks, even in shmiras haynayim. Of the hundreds of opportunities to look and see things in the street, I only sneaked a peak five times in two weeks. Amazing, but I sti...

Recovery, as far as I know, is not about improving ourselves at all, it is about getting the heck out of G-d's way and allowing Him to fix us. Those are not words, it is subtle but totally different mindset. And as far as stopping "once and for all", it's on Hashem's time...

The very phrases "Hayom al l'vovecha" and "asher Anochi metzaveh es'chem Hayom" in kriyas sh'ma are both darshened by chazal to mean that His proclamation here is new - today is the first day we have heard of it! Now, to me, this is precisely living one day at a time. It ...

When we talk about "surrender" in the first step, it doesn't mean "falling", at all. Those who surrender do not act out. They never do. It makes one free of the lust because we get out of Hashem's way and allow Him - yes, allow Him - to remove it. At least temporarily. It...

Everybody contributes their own perspective on deep and broad things such as what living with Simcha means, and whether our root problem is the lack of Simcha or whether it is really something else. I'm also here to share my chelek for the benefit of whoever wants it. Wha...

"Struggling&StrivingBT" writes: So, like all, becoming a Bal Teshuvah has by no means been easy, and I'm by no means there yet. One of the hardest parts has been in the area of "self gratification". While intellectually, I understand what is so bad about wasting seed,...

Precious things are not gained overnight. Yetzias mitzrayim was a big, fat, jump - a completely undeserved gift to us 49th-levelers. After the free jump, it was almost completely lost to us and we had to grow slowly from zero for 49 days before getting the Torah... then w...

Your note reminds me of a lot of stuff my wife and I have been through. I will try to share everything I have about this, be"H, with you. Please read it over and please bear with me. Forgive me if I say anything that sounds judgmental or critical of you, as I mean nothi...