The Library

 

When I start to fantasise or have euphoric recall, I have to accept I cannot use lust successfully. Can you share how you diffuse the situation? Specifically, people have been saying "get on your knees and ask for G-d". Where does G-d come into those moments? Dov Responds...

We all sing Rebbe Akivah's ma'amar about "Mikveh Yisroel Hashem" on Lag ba'Omer... Do we hear what we are saying? Hashem is our Mikvah - not the mikvah, but Hashem. Now, what's that supposed to mean? To me, it means that our mikvah of water is an embodiment of Hashem's Ch...

Sifrei chassidus, including B'nei Yisos'char, elaborate on the fact that the light of the Chanukah menorah contains ohr haganuz and is miraculous. For this reason, "ein lanu reshus l'hishtamesh bohen, ella lir'osom bilvad." We have no permission to behave as though it's o...

I think that this recording (Shiur #8 of Dov's Shovavim Chaburah) was a very good one, in my opinion. The entire subject and what he writes (in the Kuntress "Derech Emes", is controversial. I think if you listen carefully, you will understand very well why so many frumm...

Look, I go to meetings cuz I am an addict. And I am not denying the possibility that Holy Man is an addict, too. And I certainly do not wish to c"v dissuade anyone who may (or may not) be an addict from finding the help they need - and certainly many addicts are helped in 12 step fellowships, as I am, b"H. But I believe we should not be implying that he should consider going to meetings tonight solely on the basis of how bad or dangerous what he is doing may be.

Dear Dov, What are some things we can do to build integrity into our lives? Sometimes there seems to be some in one area, but less in another. -Looking for Integrity Dear Looking, There are many ways of bringing Integrity into our lives but I believe that all of them are...

Dear chaver, You wrote to GYE in response to a share I wrote that GYE posted in their chizuk email: OK, Dov, very inspiring insight. What would someone like me, who found out about GYE at 51 years old and can recall being attracted to women from age three, when would I s...

No person in the world is as dirt-poor as the luster. - Dov

Every Shabbos morning in shul, I am makpid to fit in 'tefila l'Moshe' (together with yoshev b'seiser) even if I am late for p'sukei d'zimra. This is because I think of the years my father suffered in slave labor camps during the Holocaust and I know that he's up there now...

Click here to listen to the Desperadoes Song To join Dov's 12-Step Desperadoes group twice a week, click here for more info. Lyrics: There's a moment in this journey that I gave up My boots just couldn't walk another mile And that cloud above me had no silver lining I ...

I just said Mizmor Shir chanukas habayis l'Dovid in davening, which I love saying cuz He really did "switch (hofachto) my mourning into a dance for (lee) me." And I wanted to share that this has nothing to do with religion or sinning or Teshuvah for me - and that is very ...

We know that Hashem went 'out of His way' to reveal to Avraham his great reward: "S'chorcha harbei me'od." Rashi tells us that part of the reason He did that was because Avrohom Avinu assumed that he had depleted his merits because of certain special favors that G-d had d...

Dear Lost, Regarding your very important concern about changing our lives vs living only one day at a time, there are a few things I'd like to share with you. One is that Hashem cannot possibly be naive. And since He sees us make the same mistakes over and over while a...

Dear Dov, A woman wrote to us admitting that she did terrible things, lied a lot, and ruined her life as a result. Her children were taken away from her, she is on parole, etc... She is devastated, feels hopeless, and is racked by guilt. Dov Responds: Hashem loved her ...

Yaakov asks Dov: If someone (who is likely an addict) asks us about the "issur" in these things, how do you suggest we steer them to the real issues? Dov Responds: Try to see if they are really convinced that if they could be convinced it were assur, they'd stop. Once ...

I like to be real, not philosophical. The body is craving the masturbation and does it ("leiv chomed uk'lei mayseh gomrin"). And the body rarely cares about philosophy, of course. The body is what's getting the payoff here. I would never have stopped due to halacha - aye,...

I'm sorry that your struggles and your sobriety have been so uncomfortable at times. Hashem will help you have the kind of sobriety that is only uncomfortable some of the time - and then, that is comfortable nearly all the time - and then, really great most of the time et...

Someone wrote to Dov recently: Hi Dov, I recently listened to a bunch of recorded calls from your morning Q and A series while I did some painting at home the last few days. I appreciate the time and attention you put into getting help to folks. I also appreciate the...

The Torah does not talk about any mental illnesses directly. The main reason this omission vexes so many and is a recurrent topic on GYE is simple: this particular addiction happens to involve a sin, while alcoholism and drug-addiction do not. Suddenly, an emergency ens...