The Library

I haven't acted out for a few weeks, but I don't find my wife attractive. She's pregnant and doesn't wear makeup at home. What can I do? Yaakov Responds: First of all, who decreed that a man must be always attracted to his wife? Hashem gives each person what they need...

We recently got a question from a popular Rav who deals with many young men. He wrote as follows: “A few people asked me lately; if someone watched porn in the past and now is getting married and they want to lower their expectations, can you give me advice or suggestions...

A GYE User wrote: I feel that I’ve been numbed by watching so much garbage to the concept of infidelity, which seems so thrilling etc. I'm very disturbed by this, because even if I can stop watching vids, the allure remains. I’m not dating yet, but I really want to try ch...

Question: I’m 18 and according to Chazal I should get married. It is just not fair! My desires and urges are so great but I have at least 3 years to go until I get married! Sometimes I just feel like giving up. What is the proper outlook? Answer: First of all, Hashem sen...

In response to the article called "Sister-In-Laws", a member sent in the following: Thank you for a wonderful publication that is a lifeline for so many. I wanted to comment on the issue of how best to deal with an attractive sister-in-law, and in particular to the P.S....

Question: "Hi, I find myself lusting over my sister-in-law (wife’s younger sister). B”h this is not my main struggle, however it does come and go occasionally. I think it’s because she looks more feminine than my wife. She got married recently and she is very attractive a...

Question from a GYE member: I have a philosophical question. I've been struggling with shmiras ainayim and shmiras habris for many years now, and I have so many different struggles in my life. I don't really complain though, because I believe that a lot of it is because o...

I'm reaching out because I'm stuck. Because of so many years of acting out, every woman I now see is an object. For the past 4 yrs, I've been living in hell. Granted I didn't work on shmiras einayim till recently and i've finally made a kabala not to watch porn a few mont...

Q: I'm 21. I don't masturbate or watch porn but I find girls tantalizing. Being shomer negiah, there isn't any release, and I'd like to be able to interact with girls without being a creep/perv. What can I do? GYE Responds: The fact you don't masturbate or watch porn is...

Q: I am 24 years old and in shidduchim and I feel lost in the whole parshah, how to deal with my lust issues legabay Shidduchim. I don't know if this is something you could help me with but I am in need of guidance and I don't have where to get it from. A: There are two ...

Question: I find myself able to hold strong with the routine challenges, like I know when I go here there's going to be that etc I'm prepared, but I almost have no defense when the challenge arises in a completely unexpected time or place. It's almost like my yetzer hara ...

I, unfortunately, shared a lot of girls and women pictures over the years. I've tried to do whatever I can to delete and prevent circulation now but I know that some people still have them.

A client has asked me whether I would be prepared to be his Webchaver to help him stop watching porn. Essentially this means that there would be a download of the History of Sites he has visited and Alerts if he visits any porn sites, sent to my nominated email.

B”H, I’m doing okay — almost 12 full days - but I’m scared I will just have a sudden fall. I’m trying to put in an effort every day but maybe one day I’ll simply be possessed by my Y”H and masturbate, and either not care or just not have the power to stop it in the moment.

The problem is that you are fighting. A good driver needs guardrails only in an emergency - to drive constantly bumping against the guardrails is a problem. 

Question: Hi, I'm 26 years old. I am married for a bit over 5 years and from the beginning, have not had much of an attraction for my wife. However, after having 2 kids, my wife gained a lot of weight and now I have absolutely no attraction to her. I spoke to her about th...

QUESTION: I just came home from summer camp, and I found out my little brother got an iPod with unrestricted internet on it. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do because I myself have unlimited internet. I'm scared he's going to end up like me. Can you help? ANSWER: Are y...

Question: I grew up without anyone teaching me about Kedusha issues, and I always thought that I was alone in my struggles and that I was a major loser. It wasn't until after my marriage that I found GYE and read the handbook (especially the "Attitude Principles") that I ...