The Library

Question: It feels like sometimes the effort to to avoid tumah, pritzus, etc.. itself seems to cause one to think about the very thing that they are trying to avoid. Am I wrong? Maybe just putting forth a little less effort will enable some people to have more success (p...

Someone asked us this question: The 12-Steps say that we need to surrender to Hashem and he will fight for us. But weren't there Tzadikim who wanted to earn their spiritual levels on their own?   Answer: Tzadikim who wanted to do it alone doesn't mean they didn't need H...

Q. B"H I'm doing well. But I'm still easily triggered and sometimes can't get certain thoughts or images out of my mind. I console myself by saying, 'yes, but you're not acting on them', but still...when does it go away? How do you control your thoughts?   GYE Answers: ...

Question: "Why am I so easily aroused and triggered by everything I see? When I walk in the street or even see a children's movie, there are just so many triggers. Have I messed up my mind for life?" GYE Answers: Almost anyone who was once addicted to these things has in...

Question: I've given up the bad stuff already for a few months, but I still feel far from learning to control my eyes. When we see a beautiful girl, and we really KNOW that it's really nothing, but it affects our senses, how in the world can we deal with that? I mean, it ...

Someone who we helped convince to join the 12-Step groups, sent us an e-mail recently as follows: I've had good groups of days, but the big picture is still horrible. I truly hope and am optimistic that one day I will climb out and help others too, but as of today it seem...

The way I see it, the addiction is only a symptom of a larger "disease", which is a general "disconnect" from the very root of what makes us mentchen. The 12-Steps were designed to give a person a refreshed perspective of what it means to be a human being - created in Has...

We have previouly discussed how the 12-Steps give us a set of guidelines that are basic foundations of what it means to be a human being - created in the image of G-d. We have also discussed that it is only after our foundations are solid that can we begin to build on top...

A member called "Yaakov" posted a reply to "eme" (edited): I have done the 12 steps without the groups, so I can testify that it is possible to grow from the 12 steps without the groups. However, those who went to the groups will tell that you will gain a lot by going to ...

Ilan posted a question on the forum: Hi Reb GYE and the Rest of Us,About 4 years ago, there was a certain girl who was in one of my university classes. She caught my attention as soon as I saw her, but as a decent observant Jew, I always avoided her like I avoided all gir...

"ShomerAiyin" posted on the forum: Sorry to burst everyone's pre-Shavuot highs, but I'm having a bit of a crisis. I don't know how to internalize everything written on this site, including the 12 steps. - I've read the 2 handbooks, both the GYE Handbook and the Attitude ...

Yosef Yakov Posts a question: "Where I used to view my addiction as an impediment for growth, I realize today how it served as an impetus for growth". There is no doubt whatsoever that Hashem accepts our Teshuva and that the sins stemming from our addictions are being era...

I've been slipping a lot lately, doing things and going places I know shouldn't. It's so hard to fight this addiction. I feel a desperate need inside me for a loving and intimate relationship. I wanted to know what you think about marriage. It's been on my mind lately, I ...

Someone Posted: I am a mental case! I swore to god that I will be clean for 30 days or if I fail then he should take my life because I can’t be bothered anymore, and I still fell! What now?   Dear Yid, you have an illness known as addiction. Rabbi Twerski once responded t...

Q. I am looking for strategies to help me. A bit of background: I have been clean now for 58 days, in large part thanks to my discovery of this site. The strategies & Chizuk from this site have been invaluable. This length of time is a very big accomplishment for me. ...

MosheF asks: I am part of a non-Jewish 12-Step SA fellowship. I wish there was a solution to the disease of addiction in yiddishkeit, but to the best of my knowledge there is none. There is hardly mention of the concept of addiction or a solution in chazal or mussar sefor...

Someone asks: I have been doing a lot of thinking, and I noticed that ever since I've stopped "acting out", for the past 2 and a half months, I've just been facing life difficulties which I don't know how to solve, so I am left with bottled up anger. Before 2 and a half...

Dear Guard, Please read my story below. I need advice about what I must do now. My name is Rabbi Moshe, I am a sex and love addict and a kiruv professional. My addiction has progressed to exhibitionism, threatening my parnosso and my sanity. I am also very addicted to por...