The Library

Finding sobriety in Pornography and Sexual Addiction is something that is being sought by more people every day. I have seen many people sob wanting to get better. I have heard people say, "Why can't it just go away!" "Why do I keep falling!?" "It's like I am two differen...

Hello Reb Elya, I have a question with the First Step, which is where I am holding in SA: I feel well armed to fight the lust battle, with: TaPhSiC method and the Three Second Rule and I can take off my glasses and post on the Forum and call chaverim 24/6 and I read the ...

This addiction is rarely a Shalom Bayis issue. It is usually an abuse and trauma issue that happens during childhood where a person feels abandoned. Yetzer Horoh or not, once a person looks at this stuff it becomes addictive, and no amount of learning Torah is going to fi...

I woke up late. I'm late to work (I ride my bike). I forgot ya'aleh v'ya'vo in shachris and I only realized in musaf :-) (I went back and said both again).. Has G-d stopped loving me??? Absolutely not. My wife called me during my ride to see if I'm Ok. My kids went happy ...

For years on end I thought I was a bad Jew that needed to become a good Jew (which is true), and that if I become a good Jew then this will stop... As it turns out, no matter how much I improved my Jewishness, my lusting really never really moved in the same direction... ...

Chevra, See the picture below. We have a choice of two pairs of Glasses to wear in life. The "Dark Pair" of Glasses that have been practically welded to our head after years and years of living our OWN Design for living. Or the "Rose Colored" Glasses that we get by workin...

The joy is great, and so the pain. 15 years of desperate cries, with no answer. At last there is a light to be seen at the end of the tunnel. 15 years of trying every method in the books. 15 years of having a double life. 15 years of silence and being hopeless. 15 years o...

It is so humbling to read a post from Dov. He says it like it is, and is so on target. I think the thing that impresses me the most and gives me the most hope, is that Dov is so comfortable with who he is. For me, the first step towards recovery was admitting that who I r...

He stood in front of the crowd, men, and many wives, and while looking out, he said: "A lot of you won't be here in 20 years"..... ...There was a break for dinner, and when he came back afterwards, he said that "during the break, many of you came over to me and complaine...

Dear Reb Guard,I just wanted to share with you that after much experimentation on myself, I have come to the conclusion that using filtration to keep me sober is only good as a "short term" solution. It's a good beginning, BUT, eventually it will back fire. A true addict ...

I woke up today feeling R.I.D (Restlessness, Irritability, and Discontent) big-time. I began to shout "MAY DAY!"... I held myself together long enough to turn on some Purim music. I picked up one of my children and danced with them. My 6 month old son was in his chair, an...

Yehuda Mintz from www.recoverythroughtorah.com sent us an e-mail today: It is important for addicts, especially in our frum community, to know that addiction is a disease, and this disease cannot be dealt with like a regular Yetzer Harah; it is a chemical imbalance of the...

Hi to my Brothers and Sisters in Recovery, My name is Yehuda Mintz, I am a brother in recovery. My sobriety date, b'shasdey Hashem, is September 10, 2000 - Yom Yom, 1 day at a time. I am a newcomer to GUARD YOUR EYES. My heartfelt yasher koach. I am writing to share some...

True happiness comes when we become givers not takers, when we give of ourselves to help others INCLUDING OUR WIVES. Linking happiness to fulfilling every life pleasure is more like bondage to self. The pleasure doesn't last. Take a vacation, for example. You have a great...

For once I feel like I have made some progress in this battle - after over a decade of failure. The most amazing thing happened to me today. I had a day off and I was reading the White Book (I can relate to it more than the 12 Steps AA book.) I really tried to internalize...

I am powerless over lust - it makes my life unmanageable. If I am truly and completely powerless, there must be One that has power (otherwise I may be atheist). That One in my life is God (Hashem). Today I believe 2 critical things. (1) That God will and always does decid...

Reading the 12-Step program doesn't help. Doing them helps, and you can't do them alone. You need a group.Our acting out is a symptom, we are trying to release our pain and frustration. We just as easily, and maybe as often, use other escapes as well. That could be smas...

The big book says the obsession of every alcoholic is to drink like a gentleman. The obsession of every lust addict is to lust like a gentlemen. Isn't it a pity I can't peek at porn, I can't watch provocative movies, and I cant peek at the pretty candy on the street? What...