The Library

I just got an "innocent" commercial e-mail which contained a picture that is just the type of thing that I find very triggering. If I didn't act fast, my entire sobriety would be at risk of collapse. Boruch Hashem, I was able to apply the three second rule (actually, qu...

Yesterday while on the train home, a girl came on dressed in a way that really triggers me, my gaze lingered on her as she passed me by and then I realized that I can't afford to stay in the same compartment as her so I ran into the next one (my own mini 'vayonas veyeitse...

The AA Big Book talks about "being on a new plane of existence"; a spiritual plane. Duvid Chaim often speaks about "Getting out of our heads". "Getting out of my head" means being concerned how other people are feeling, and being helpful when possible. I feel like I've re...

I have been grappling with a problem. My Filter had a loophole which when manipulated, allowed real nasty images to pass through. I was Mekabel a while back to contact the filter Gabai and have the problem fixed... I tried a few times but kept on missing him. Lately, I co...

Boruch Hashem, I am now over 550 days clean. Interestingly, my wife went to Mikva a few days ago (after 23 days unclean). Since then, things have been much more difficult for me than during the previous 23 days. I know this is a not uncommon phenomenon, but go figure! As ...

Last night, I was waiting and waiting for my wife to finish getting ready for us to go out. I was ready, the babysitter was there, but some women just take a long time to get going. Finally she says, "come on, lets go already" (as if it was my fault we were late). As we'r...

On my lunch break today, I felt tempted to go to the internet cafe round the corner to watch one of my old programs.... nuh uh - red alert! That's way too dangerous; clearly a ploy of the addiction/yetzer harah... So instead, I went and sat by a beautiful lake with ducks ...

Aryeh writes: I am a 25 year old college student struggling with viewing internet porn and, quite recently, relations with a non-Jewish ex-girlfriend from before I was frum. B''H I have been able to cut off contact with said woman, which is something I tried hard to do fo...

As I have posted elsewhere on this site, I travel a lot for my job and when I travel is the most challenging time.B"H I have been doing quite well for a while, but I have still been finding it a struggle to avoid the pool areas of the hotels I am staying at.I am currently...

HonestMouse wrote: My boss called a meeting during lunchtime and I missed Mincha, which would mean I would have to daven without a minyan. I was sulking and frustrated, mamash like a 2 year old, and I started lusting with passers by on the street. I felt very tempted to g...

Recently, I took my first business trip in a long time. A chance to choreograph a "Big Fall". Partly to "get it out of my system" (as I rationalized it) and perhaps partly a test if Hashem really wanted me saved from shmutz. Would He rescue me with His own Hand? And sure ...

An e-mail we received today: Hi Guardureyes! I just had a fight with my wife and she went storming out the door.... The first thing I did, was rush to an unprotected computer and type in very bad website. I didn't actually get to see anything in the site and I quickly rem...

Dear Guard & GYE Team, I was reading the Handbook the other night, and I read about the 3 second rule. I also got an email from a fellow member on the forum, and he told me something that he heard in a shiur, that someone who looks away after a few seconds feels like ...

Yesterday at work, I was reading the GYE forum when my boss walked past my office, so I quickly tried to minimize the screen. Unfortunately, the computer froze and was taking its sweet time trying to close. Meanwhile the Boss came to my screen and wanted to check out what...

B"H I'm doing better than ever. Slowly, staying sober and working on living right, I'm discovering a REAL PERSON underneath the exterior shell. I never knew he existed, I was always just "different". But B"H, no more. I am now like everyone else. Of course, that comes wi...

This past Thursday, I was flying back home from the "Out-of-town" city I was visiting, and unfortunately the person sitting next to me on the plane was a woman who was obviously not makpid on Rabbi Falk's standard of tznius (she was wearing what some people generously ref...