I had a conversation with one of the Chevra on here, which gave me great clarity, and I wanted to share.

There's constantly talk on here of when the urges start raining down, call a friend. How does this work, and why?

So a prerequisite to the friendships on here, is self-clarity. If I would be offered to get any of the fantasies that I have dreamed of for years, And I would be offered that today, what would I say? Yes or no?
If the answer is yes, then I am not clear in my agenda and what I want from it, and calling a friend when I do have the option of acting on that fantasy, wont necessarily help too much. I could call a friend but he very possibly wont be able to help me not act out. Because I want to act out.
If the answer is NO, I dont want this no matter what! For whatever reason, I made a conscious decision that I don't want this, then when the urge and opportunity to act out comes up. I could call a friend and he'll help me get back to that place of clarity. That place in my mind where I know what I want, without the Bilbul of the Urge. By speaking it out I'll be able to calm down and decide to control myself.

Now, how do I get to that clarity of what I really want in my life? It can come to you by yourself, or also with talking to a friend who can help you get that clarity.
Some people may have a 'moment' when they realize what they want in their life.

Either way its a must for controlling ourselves.

KOMT!!!