Wonderful to hear from you, so glad you're doing well 

Keep it up tzaddik!

35 days baby! #letsGo

38 days. the second to highest ive ever been. Its soooo hard right now. Thank god i didnt watch porn or masturbate but i am scrolling online to download some vids i want to watch and lo and behold a movie with a immoral scene in its trailer is right in front of my nose auto playing. Im so upset. I havent seen a *** scene in 5 weeks! WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY. i want to keep my eyes clean. I dont care if its not a fall on the 90 day chart, my eyes saw a *** scene. AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH. On the positive side of things i didnt masturbate and i was able to move on from the scene without wathcing it for more then a second (saw it twice for a second.... almost went down the rabbit hole) Thank god because i have become clean over the past 5 weeks by brain didnt "need it now" and i was able to use self control.

On a side note if anyone has any ideas, during the winter when its cold and rainy i get depressed and dont care about life. I dont care about streaks. I just dont give a flip about anything. I wish i could help myself. I really want to get to 90 days.

Agav Bh i will buy myself 250 dollar headphones in 52 days

Maybe get yourself a treadmill or elliptical and do some serious exercise when it's cold and rainy outside. You will iyh feel great - it is a proven mood lifter.

Yes I plan on doing exercise. Imagine a 2 yr old needing constant comfort soothing and safety. That is how i feel during winter. It feels weird. I actually almost cried in my physiatrists office today for absolutely no reason except that shes a woman and my 2 yr old self is craving a mommy to cry to.

Point is that 2 yr old's don't care too much about streaks when thier feeling depressed. I know it will be hard to understand but thats how i feel in the winter. I want to just sleeeeeeeeep And sleep and sleep until summer comes and i could be older then 20 yrs old again.

51 days until my #Bose headphones i cant wait. But i gatta remember even if i dont reach it, 38 days is unbecredible.

At day 6 had a really good Yom Kippur real heartfelt teffilos and am excited to be in this 90 day journey 

41 days. Taken it day by day. If i stay clean for the next 49 days I buy myself Bose head phones. Can everyone please daven for Human being ben human being to get to 90 days?
Thank you Hashem its sunny and hot again! #EPIC!!

42 days. Its amazing how the cleaner i am the more healing I'm getting in my therapeutic journey. I feel like I'm getting closer to marriage Beezras hashem.
Quick thought. Its amazing how when we start our journey, we truly don't know how great we can be; how great we are going to be. If only we would realize how wonderful we are in the beginning of our struggle too. GUYS YOU GUYS ARE SUCH CHASHIVE PEOPLE. WE ARE THE ONLY PEOPLE IN THE WORLD DOING THE HOLY WORK OF STAYING PURE.  WE ARE HOLDING UP THE WORLD. EVERY DAY. EVERY FALL. EVERY TIME WE PICK OURSELVES UP AND START ALL OVER AGAIN AND OVER AND OVER. EVERY TEFILA THAT HASHEM SHOULD HELP US STOP. EVERY TEAR. EVERY DREAM. EVERY GOAL. EVERY POST. EVERY CALL. EVERY DAY.    WE ARE AMAZING. WE ARE DOING THE IMPOSSIBLE IN 2022! YOU GUYS MAKE ME CRY FROM PRIDE. YOUR HOLDING UP THE WORLD.

we often tell ourselves "uch i fell"  DO YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH HOLYIER YOU ARE THEN THE WORLD AROUND YOU????? THE WORLD IS NOT EVEN TRYING!!!!!                                   

day 47. I Got farther in understanding my feelings once again. All my hatred against Frum people against learning davening mitzvos., Shabbos came out today. I didn't even know I had it inside of me.

As I move away from porn and  masturbation i move closer and closer to healing. THANK YOU HASHEM!

48. Once again I've come in content with a lot more feelings since I'm starting to think inwards and not outwards. I think I'm going to start a special thread for emotional venting when someone wants to emote instead of anything addictive sexually.

51 baby!!!!!! More pumped then ever. Been getting tougher recently. Maybe because I'm approaching my record so my brain is gearing up for failure IDK

39 days till #new Bose headphones

37 days till my headphones