A shower is when you go under a faucet which has water stream onto your body.
In the Mikvah I go to the rule is that you have to shower there before going into the Mikvah.

My dear chaver,

I recommend you spend a few weeks watching the first half (the hilarious parts) of 10 shmoozes by Rav Shalom Schwadron zt"l...but skip the serious and meaningful end parts - you don't need that stuff at all. You are clearly overdosed and suffering from a severe case of OCD (Oy! Can't Doit!).

If R' Sholom's first halfs can't save you from your PTSS (Post-Teenage Seriousness Syndrome) c"v, then try about 10 kosher badchan videos from chassidish weddings until you learn how to laugh about yourself, about humanity, and then about yourself again a little more.

...And if none of those work to loosen you up a few notches, then it'll have to be some Richard Pryor. Sorry. There may be no other way.

But that would be a last resort, and the GYE censor (I believe that's how MT gets the big bucks here) would need to 'BEEP' out all the dirty words.

But it would still work.

In fact, watching a Pryor routine is even funnier with the 'BEEP's because it then seems to be one, long 'BEEEEEPPP'!

Kind of like what the insides of our heads should sound like if we 'BEEP'd out all negative self-talk, overseriousness, euphoric recall of naked people stuff, and sports scores from before the Dodgers left Brooklyn.

You and I both need a refuah, young man.

Badly.

Dov wrote:


A shower is a "Toosh" (Redt Yiddish?).

MT - GYE Censor
(Has special privileges - besides big bucks - to use such explicit language)

Thanks for that education. I had the meaning of the word all wrong for the past few decades!

Dov, B"H I know how to laugh very well thank you, just I had no idea that this forum is not serious...

In AA they have a rule called "Rule 62". It goes like this:

Some old AA's printed a book of prominently numbered - but mostly empty - pages, the first page just reads, "Rule 1:", the next "Rule 2:", and so forth...

Except page 62 at the center, which reads in beg letters:

"Rule 62: "Don't take yourself so damn seriously!"



A funny observation along those lines that you may find helpful:

My wife helped me discover that I was taking sex far too seriously for it to be satisfying. What a concept for a perv! Sex with me isn't serious business?! Why, it is soooo very important that this time we reach the right intensity, that she looks good to me, does this or that to me, behaves 'like so', smiles at the right time and in the right way about the right things...oh, boy, please don't ruin this, ok?"

I never realized I was doing any of that!

But she did. She felt the pressure. It was stifling. No wonder I was totally convinced that "she had a sex problem"!

How many guys here are convinced their wives are abnormal? I'd say most. And they read this and shake their heads and say, "But we went to a psychologist or a Rov and he said that my wife has inhibitions about sex, etc!"

But how many of us made it clear to the shrink or Rov exactly how very 'patient' we felt ourselves to be with our wives, especially sexually...a sure sign that we were desperate inside! And our wives felt it. The Rov didn't know how pushy we were to our wives about sexual performance and importance from the very first time we were sexual with them!

The denial gets passed around and shared with those we ask eitzos to. And the wives suffer, eventually the sex-hungry husband suffers as well and goes nuts.

So, I have started to learn to relax and make sex and sexuality more of a pleasure and privilege than a 'project'. The Zohar hakodosh calls the husband the mekor hasimcha for his wife. Believe it or not, 'Simcha' is not 'erotic passion'! For me, that was a sincere shock.

Smile, and love - or don't bother being sexual at all, I say.

Sorry for joining the party after it's over. But i just wanted to share that when in the days when i would go to the mikva after masturbating, to wash off the sperm and wash away the shame, more than once i masturbated another time inside the holy waters of the mikva itself. because since now all the sperm is gonna be washed off, and all the shame is gonna be washed away, i'm never gonna need to masturbate again. so might as well enjoy it one last time.
ah, the pleasure of a stolen orgasm, without another person getting in the way......

It's interesting that such a mikvah is still kosher and still metaher just fine.

Just seeing that, is precious.

That is the awesome power and beauty of Mikvah.

thanks dov. the makor that a mikva is metaher is from that which it cannot become tamey - "אך מעין ובור מקוה מים יהיה טהור". Perhaps that's what you meant?

Yeah...so?

so i'm gratefull to be sober today.......

I'm glad that you are glad you are sober. Now, are you glad that I am glad that you are glad you are sober?

"Smile or love"-- amen to that, brother!

yeah Dov, i'm glad that you are glad that i am glad to be sober today.

now, there are probably 2 parts to that gladness. one is that it's a positive and real connection with another person who's also a sexaholic who's sober today, an identification and message of love and support . the second is that i like to feel powerfull and special, that i'm the center of all feelings and therefore everyone else who wants to exist must feel towards me.

now, if i'd like i could focus on the second thing and get all down about myself that i'm so selfcentered and evil. but that would be a rather shamefull waste of a simple and happy experience that G-d sent me, cause then the first part will be lost and forgotten. so i'd rather just admit that i have character defects because i am not (yet, ha ha) perfect, and then go ahead and focus on what there is good, and what i can do to be helpfull.

hey, it's only fair, cause i spent my whole life till now in the negative only, now it's time to take a break and take a chill and let G-d run the show and just enjoy the good things that life has to offer. for example good food, good friends, good learning, and of course good sex (yeah, sex).

Hey, you left out.....oh. Never mind. You didn't.

Ok, then.