Reb PY, I ask your permission to copy-paste your unbelievably beautiful letter. I hope to build up the courage to send it to a person or two. Ay, if the people only knew that there was help to be had!

eerie wrote on 14 Jun 2024 19:11:

Halevai more people would respond like you...
I'll be happy to discuss your question with you offline.


Indeed. I believe it is on us to help spread the word. It doesn't have to be the way I did it, it can be done anonymously also, but I do strongly believe that we have a tremendous opportunity in front of us...

I hope to hand a copy of your letter to a chashuv rav sometime soon.

R' PY, your initiative can reach who-knows-where!!!

eerie wrote on 21 Jun 2024 06:07:

Great! 
I added some contact info...

You had me crying reading your letter

I hope it makes it out there 
I wish I was in a good  enough place to sign such a thing but not yet but one day iyh
please give it out to every rebbi everywhere 
unbelievable zchus

Reb @ProudYungerman - amazing letter! It is about time that something big is done to save the thousands who are suffering needlessly, and this sounds like it can be a huge impact, reaching all the leaders...

(I just posted this on Eerie's thread about this letter)

A small thing is - GYE is not a perfect solution for everyone. I think young bachurim who are suffering from or addicted to p/m, but not exposed to the underbelly of the internet or whatever, maybe they need something more safe, less explicit about certain things, just like the BB forum is off-limits officially? In other words, if I knew a 15 year tmimusdike bachur was having an issue, but does not have unfiltered internet, I think I would not want to send him here. Makes sense?

Of course, for people who are fully exposed to the world's garbage, send him over to GYE, and the Rabanim should know about this crucial and powerful resource, for those people.

frank.lee wrote on 25 Jun 2024 20:21:

If you have a young 15 year old תמימותד'יג bachur who's addicted (or even not actually addicted but exposed) to porn and masturbation, Than GYE is the best bet that exists to make sure they don't fall in deeper. Maybe there should be a specific Bachurim Forum the same way there is a BB forum which can be much more heavily moderated

eerie wrote on 21 Jun 2024 06:07:

Heck, maybe it can even reach YOUKNOWWHO

redfaced wrote on 25 Jun 2024 21:56:

I'm curious about that actually. I'd like to hear HHM's take on this. A very significant percentage of 15ish year old bachurim now have been exposed to porn and masturbation (maybe not hardcore porn, but erotic imagery on the internet). But they haven't been exposed to clubs, chatting, camming, cheating on a spouse, massage parlors, or many other topics on GYE (off the BB forum). I bet a kid who hasn't gotten in too deep would do better with an honest talk with a knowledgeable rebbi, a good read of TBOTG, a good talk with his parents so they filter the devices he's using to fall, and an accountability program. Zeh hu. If a knowledgeable rebbi is unavailable, gye can provide

GYE (the forum and even the F2F program maybe) would overwhelm and overexpose them.
A 20+ yr old bachur who's been exposed to more is a different story.

chosemyshem wrote on 25 Jun 2024 22:49:

Very valid points.
One he'arah: (It's nitpicky - just for you chooseurname!)
To me the age doesn't really matter as much as the level of exposure.
You can have younger bochurim exposed to way more garbage than a sheltered, temimusdike older bochur...

(One thing to keep in mind though, is that even for someone like me, who was exposed to a lot of stuff here, would be way worse off if not for this place...)

There was an idea suggested on the other thread about starting a bochurim's forum which I think is a great idea!

redfaced wrote on 25 Jun 2024 22:40:

No chance...

#cordnoy

proudyungerman wrote on 25 Jun 2024 23:04:

regarding bochurim.  bochurim by nature are extremely curious.  many of them will dig through the site to gather as much information as they can.  This is not inherently a disaster but it is not lechatchila.  Educating rabbonim and rebbeim with the yesodos of what works for many of us will help them teach bachurim how to deal with the yetzer hara.  Making sure that they are aware of books such as the battle of the generation will give them more resources.  From what i understand, there are people out there that are trying to spread these messages but it is a drop in the bucket.  I would love to see a conference for rabbonim and mechanchim geared specifically to this subject.    Until recently, much of the education has been in the direction of filters and avoiding smartphones.  These are important but they miss the core subject as pretty much everyone will still be exposed at some point.  

Bochurim, especially younger ones need a mentor/rebbi, much more than access to GYE. The typical bochur is simply not able to access GYE - he is in a dormitory with no Internet use (and if he does have, it is secret, and therefore cannot spend time on the site). He also does not need GYE - rather a caring understanding intelligent adult to guide him. And with the exception of the very exposed bochur, GYE will inadvertently chas v'shalom educate him about things he should not know.  However, a very exposed  bochur would b'ezras Hashem benefit from GYE.

Of course there are no "one size fits all", and there are exceptions to what was written above; but that's the general idea.

I have shared some of my personal experience and Reb PY's heilige letter to one of my past Roshei Yeshiva whom I know will understand and really think about it. Thank you ProudYungerman for providing the template that has allowed me to share and hopefully help even if only one person, though maybe countless. Even one Yid is limitless potential. We do not know the impact we can have with even a small gesture. 
Kol Tov

Day #180

Today is a special day for me. 180 days ago I made the phone call that changed my life. I gathered the courage, strength, and plain old guts, and called HHM.
BH, I am now 6 months clean in a way I never knew was possible.
Thank you HHM, thank you to my special chaveirim from GYE, and thank you Hashem!