I have been dealing lately with a couple where the wife busted her husband and found out all about his infidelity. The massage parlors, the porn, the phone relationships. As you can all imagine, all hell broke loose
And I found it fascinating that this woman is mostly destroyed by the fact that her husband was shmoozing with Jewish women on the phone. Women he never met. In her words, the having sex in the massage parlors, the porn, even the discussing inappropriate things on chat lines, that doesn't kill her. She understands that men can have a tayva, and they'll do crazy things to get their tayva fulfilled. Of course it bothers her, very much so, but it doesn't kill her. It's the shmoozing about stam things with those Jewish women that he found on those cursed chat lines that she can't forgive. In her words, "am I not even good enough for a conversation?"
There's the part that she sees this as a relationship, as a threat to her own, etc. Bottom line is, a woman can be much more distraught that her husband is casually shmoozing with another women in an inappropriate setting, than she is by the fact that he had sex with other women

I don't know if anybody pointed this out to the oilam yet.
The changing of the clock is hard. Erev purim stress is hard. Tired, stressed people have a harder time withstanding urges.
Tired, stressed people that have a bottle or two of wine for a lchaim instead of stressing reach out to friends have been BH quite successful