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TOPIC: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 2450 Views

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 17 Dec 2021 04:11 #375016

  • farmer k.
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Yoina mutzhoo wrote on 18 Nov 2021 14:29:
Hi

There is another term called "Hypersexual" and/or "Nymphomania".
Becoming aroused often, and having a lack of control over the arousal.

Mindfulness based exercises can help with hypersexuality. which teach the body to not overreact to erotic clues and sexual stimuli.

I saw that Valsalva maneuver can help to relieve the epididymis pain. i wonder if it works.

From wikipedia: The Valsalva maneuver is performed by moderately forceful attempted exhalation against a closed airway, usually done by closing one's mouth and pinching one's nose shut while expelling air out as if blowing up a balloon. 

Basically it is: inhaling, closing the air pathway, forcing some pressure like blowing out for around 20-30 seconds. this temporary restrict the blood flow and reduce the tension on the teticaules, epididymis, prostate gland, and the Corpus cavernosum.

I wonder if that exercise can worked for anyone. 

Enjoy!

Yoinala

I have used this method in the past with out knowing its a real medical "zach" it has moderate effectiveness on me
The ultimate goal of farming is not the growing of crops, but the cultivation and perfection of human beings

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 17 Dec 2021 16:12 #375038

  • yoina mutzhoo
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farmer k. wrote on 17 Dec 2021 04:11:

Yoina mutzhoo wrote on 18 Nov 2021 14:29:
Hi

There is another term called "Hypersexual" and/or "Nymphomania".
Becoming aroused often, and having a lack of control over the arousal.

Mindfulness based exercises can help with hypersexuality. which teach the body to not overreact to erotic clues and sexual stimuli.

I saw that Valsalva maneuver can help to relieve the epididymis pain. i wonder if it works.

From wikipedia: The Valsalva maneuver is performed by moderately forceful attempted exhalation against a closed airway, usually done by closing one's mouth and pinching one's nose shut while expelling air out as if blowing up a balloon. 

Basically it is: inhaling, closing the air pathway, forcing some pressure like blowing out for around 20-30 seconds. this temporary restrict the blood flow and reduce the tension on the teticaules, epididymis, prostate gland, and the Corpus cavernosum.

I wonder if that exercise can worked for anyone. 

Enjoy!

Yoinala

I have used this method in the past with out knowing its a real medical "zach" it has moderate effectiveness on me

Thanks for sharing!

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 20 Dec 2021 01:27 #375075

  • astrugglingjew
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Thank you for making a thread about this!
This is something I am currently going through myself (and have talked about a bit on my thread if you are interested) and also find to be super challenging.

The whole process is so difficult for staying clean and with clean thoughts. By nature so much tayva gets aroused, which is natural, but definitely so difficult when not so clear how to channel all that tayva. With my experience I wish I had tons of amazing tips and remedies, but I don't have too much. But I hope that knowing that you are not alone helps and knowing that someone is struggling through the same thing is comforting in some way.

I will share that the way I approach it, and it's not really a tactic, rather more of a mindset. Disclaimer  this may not be correct, and I have not been perfect myself, but I think this mindset has helped at times. 

I try to use the fact I may be at the start of the relationship with my future wife as motivation to push through and stay clean. How wonderful would it be if the relationship with our wife's could be ones of tahara from the beginning. In this parsha we are looking to build relationships filled with kedusha, so I think for me that motivates me for that extra push to be as kodesh as possible. And especially if I am spiritually inspired by the girl, I remind myself that I would never want to disappoint her.

Just my thoughts. May be a little different that what you were looking for but I hope it helps in some way.

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 24 Dec 2021 03:29 #375219

  • farmer k.
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hi thought this might be a good thread to ask this question, that every morning I wake up with an erection no mater how I sleep, if anyone has advice for this it will be really appreciated
The ultimate goal of farming is not the growing of crops, but the cultivation and perfection of human beings

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 24 Dec 2021 12:00 #375233

  • Hashem Help Me
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Ignore it. The subconscious does not appreciate our getting clean and depriving these "pleasures" from our bodies. Therefore when it is in charge - when our conscious mind is asleep, it attempts to arouse us. This is what causes many guys who are in the process of breaking free, and despite truly watching their eyes during the day online and on the street, to have graphic wet dreams. Eventually the subconscious gives in and these episodes happen less and less. Hatzlocha.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 27 Dec 2021 00:31 #375287

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sleepy wrote on 26 Dec 2021 23:49:

  • "sleepy" post=375284 date=1640562071 catid=19



sleepy wrote on 26 Dec 2021 23:39:

farmer k. wrote on 24 Dec 2021 03:29:
hi thought this might be a good thread to ask this question, that every morning I wake up with an erection no mater how I sleep, if anyone has advice for this it will be really appreciated

i was once watching tv with my father it was a medical show  and an old man was talking how due to old age  he doesnt wake up with an erection in the morning anymore , i asked my father whats E******n and my father explained it to me and i said oh right, i get that all the time..:awkward silence:... unfortunately my father didnt have the awareness  to teach me how to be careful and to figure out why i was like that and get me help , love my father but he didnt know... anyway what i want to bring out  is that based on the program it seemed that its normal to wake up like that  , so i wouldnt worry, there might be some people here are against giving out  this advice on a anonymous forum, and might feel that you should speak to a professional , maybe theyre right 

i think i was 11 or 12 yrs old

now that im thinking it over, i shouldnt have complaints at my father, gevalt ,if i was faced with such a situation , what would I say?!,
any suggestions  from the chevra what to tell a child  in such a case?

The truth. When told to children at a young age in clinical terms you are doing them a massive favor - sparing them years of confused agony. It is also an opportunity to open healthy lines of communication about sexuality, sparing them the imagined need for secrecy when nisyonos appear.....
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Help with Shidduchim and arousal. 27 Dec 2021 13:40 #375299

  • lodaas
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sleepy wrote on 27 Dec 2021 06:47:

Markz wrote on 20 Nov 2021 23:02:

lodaas wrote on 20 Nov 2021 18:31:
Reb Ahron Kotler zichrono livrocha held that one must wear loose underwear to avoid kishuy. After having this problem for a long time I changed to boxer shorts and it helped loads. though in the beginning it takes time to get used to them. good luck 

It’s one of Gye’s tools. 
Get in the ring and fight the good fight bro!

please dont belittle Reb Aharon ZL,ty

Dont know this would be belittling Reb Aharon. I heard this from a grandson so it might be tora shebaal peh. Btw that why chasidim wear gadches which are very loose. Feel free to try it makes a huge difference
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