You seem to be getting good advice here, and even coming with some on your own.  I can only tell you what my first step (and it's really simple) was --- buy a thermos or canteen and keep it as close to your head as possible.  Fill it up with water from the sink every night (to the top) and every morning dump the leftover water in the toilet and flush it.  In Jewish mystic beliefs (kabbalah) water has many purifying properties.  The reason I choose to start this routine is because of the following story that's written somewhere in the mishnah (one our cryptic commentaries on the Torah): Before G-d created Eve, Adam had a first wife named Lilith.  She was extremely beautiful, but in actuality was a demon.  The kabbalistic interpretation continues that Lilith hangs around in a dream-state and she seduces young men by invading their dreams and plantic scenes and thoughts of an improper sexual nature.  So I chose to start my bedtime ritual with the water because of its purifying properties in the hopes that Lilith (and everything she represents) does not cause me to hurt myself in that sense at night when we are most vulnerable because it is our belief that the soul leaves the body at night to return to G-d to be refreshed, and we assume He will return it to us in the morning.  There is actually a prayer thanking and blessing G-d for doing so that we say immediately upon waking up.  I don't know if I was helpful at all, but I thought I'd share.  :D

the mind tells the body that it needs to release the sexual tension in some form or another.  perhaps a healthy way to deal with this is when you get that feeling read a holy book or do some other activity that you enjoy that has nothing to do with women or sex.  you may think it unimportant and that you need your sleep...but your rest will be much easier once you've used this routine and be able to do it easily and without really thinking about it.