Baruch Hashem!i installed it right now guard.thank G-d i feel such relief.i feel a shtickle queasy(see tryings blog) but nonetheless im happy.its forsure not worth it if i cant have any pornography.much less enjoyable.thanks for saving me reb guard  :-*

i knew the rav i heard him speak and i read part of his book :just one jew.i see what u mean.shkoyach

Wow, JERUSALEM A+! ( suits you much better, thanks guard for the idea)

Keep on going! Keep making everyone @ GUE and of course Hashem proud! You revealed your true colors today in the BM. Now you can't back out anymore. We're waiting for more...

bs"d

Thank you so much for being strong! Keep inspiring us!

aw u guys  :D .so sweet.day 8 is here baruch hashem.still giong strong.did not make vasikin at the kosel,but what can u do  :-\ last night was a really close call.thank u guard for helping me hook up k9 so quickly.another half hour and i dont think i wouldve made it.girl-free shabbos chevra thank G-d.but i am in yerushalayim so i could very well run into some girls i used to know.i think ill just stay indoors.daven byichidus.

friday is such a hard day!!2 types of times i fall:when im sad,or when im stressed.right now im so stressed.friday in my house is crazy.but im not allowed to leave i have a lot of siblings that need to be taken care of.and im already sensitive and stressed cause im on day 8 without relief and im in my first 60 days not smoking still.im seriously bugging out here!!

bs"d

Uri, you  are in my prayers. Hold on!

have a good Shabbes!

good news,chevra.im still holding strong.i passed my big test:the shower.so the steak continues.
(i feel like barry bonds shooting for 70.but im shooting for much farther)

Good Shabbos , Uri!

Keep going!

Uri, we're all rooting for you. How did Shabbos go?

Gut Voch,chevra
thank Hashem my shabbos was beautiful.im now approaching the end of day 9.but i shouldnt get too comfortable,saturday night theres an extra song pull always for me.i spent shabbos in yerushalayim and on my way to the kosel friday night i accidentaly(i promise) walked by the edge of town.so many drunk guys and girls.i was shocked!i had no idea friday night was so packed.i was alittle turned on by the good looking half dressed girls,but it was way overpowered by my shock and sadness.i was overcome with emotion(this does not happen to me often).when i got to the kosel i started crying.i couldnt help myself.theres so much tumah in the world in the holiest city and im part of it.and theres so many young yidden who dont know the joy and kedusha of shabbos.but anyway,back to me.i was hoping subconciously that i would run into a girl i knew in the old city but thank G-d i didnt run into her.G-d knows my obstacles.He guards me well.
when i drove home tonight i passed town again(only way to go really) and i felt such mixed feelings.i saw teens with no inhibitions just feeding off lust.i felt angry that they could fill their needs while i sit and struggle to keep myself in check.they look so happy,while i feel so discontent.what happened to the happiness Judiasm is said to offer??thats what many rebbeim say at least.
2 peices of advice i read somewhere on this site helped me have a much better shabbos. 1)no matter what werer able to give,give it.it gives Hashem tremendous nachas ruach. 2)cry to hashem whenever.plead for mercy.spill your heart out always.Hashem desires the heart.
but then again,arent those 2 one and the same?

i hate saturday night!!why cant we just skip to sunday.
and i hate hate hate filters!!!
but seriously its saving my life knowing that i cant watch porn so anything i do will be much less enjoyable and it wont be worth the depression.thanks Guard.

...but i still hate them

Just letting the olam know im about to fall.It was a good run,though.im just feeling too depressed to think straight right now.guard,u couldnt have picked a worse time to send me that message

Woah, Uri.

Hold in there. Please please dont fall. :'(

Nows the time to cry your eyes out to Hashem.
I hear how torn you are. On one hand, you really reallywant to do the correct thing and hold back. On the other hand, you see the world having what seems to be such fun - and you want to be part of it.

Uri, do you have any sisters / female cousins? Think in your mind what it is you wish you could be doing right now.  Now picture that the female in your fantasy is your sister. DOnt you love her more than that? Dont you want only the best for her? Wouldnt you wish for her a loving relationship with someone who REALLY cares for her on the deepest level?
Not only are the girls you know worth more than a fling, but you yourself are DONT SELL YOURSELF SHORT.

Dear Uri,

you should know that you are far from being alone in describing those symptoms of addiction.many people have sunk into this addiction and other addictions and it always feels overwhelming.thank Hashem many great methods have been found to break the addictions,and you will be among the many to escape iy'h.Read through the vast material on this site and you will find what works for you best.we must understand the insanity,where it comes from,the koach that pushes it,and so forth.in a short time,i know youll be back on your feet,with G-d's help.all the best.keep posting