Welcome, Guest

Group 196
(0 viewing) 
A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.

TOPIC: Group 196 38695 Views

Re: Group 196 17 Jan 2017 17:06 #303400

  • gevura shebyesod
  • Current streak: 1313 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4183
  • Karma: 505
Singularity wrote on 17 Jan 2017 14:23:

Markz wrote on 17 Jan 2017 13:58:

Singularity wrote:

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote:
How can we get past this?
and not fall/fail...and hit 90 days and then 180 days and then 360 days?
It is possible to break free. But even after trying 34 different things and spending
a ton of time working on it, I still don't know how.
Change my personality? not likely. 
Change a middah? not likely...harder than learning all of Shas
Fight an emotion with an emotion...what does that entail doing?
Hard to see or feel how I'm any closer than before I started any of these 34 things,
enumerated on my 90-day thread.

Maybe you only need 12 things...

No, only 1!!

An insanity test

Cordnoy and me truly passed it with flying colors.

You're right. Only the truly insane would confuse subjects with objects

Or the truly grammar challenged.
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: Group 196 17 Jan 2017 19:22 #303423

  • will Succeed Beh
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • I'm an Addict-I Surrender Lust to G-D-I'm powerles
  • Posts: 205
  • Karma: 11
Hello guys, just a quick u/d.

Spoke to my sponsor the first time today, for about 5 min, will start to read the 12 Step program, my Mentor/Councillor said should not start meetings yet...

LOL
BE"H WE WILL ALL SUCCEED
My Thread
Mini Community
טאטע! אפילו איך שפיר זיך ווייט פון דיר, אוי אוי אוי
ווייס איך אז די ביסט נאנט צו מיר אזוי, אוי אוי אוי
מיט ליבשאפט ווי אן איינציג קינד, פון בענקשאפט א טרערעלע רינט
ואהבת עולם, אהבת עולם אהבתיך

Re: Group 196 18 Jan 2017 07:44 #303466

  • Singularity
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • To write, or not to write?
  • Posts: 1507
  • Karma: 78
will Succeed Beh wrote on 17 Jan 2017 19:22:
Hello guys, just a quick u/d.

Spoke to my sponsor the first time today, for about 5 min, will start to read the 12 Step program, my Mentor/Councillor said should not start meetings yet...

LOL

What is this madness? No meetings? Well, I can't speak.. Ask someone more experienced than you and...

oh wait.
"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his sobriety level?"
"... It's over NINE-ZEROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

One day... At A Time :-D


Introduce Yourself and get a free karma point from yours truley!
My Thread

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 01:45 #303554

  • shua73
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 263
  • Karma: 7
UUpdate for today is that it's weird that I've noticed that now that I realized that I was tricking myself with Baal gaavehnes (cool word I think), even if I watch a movie now I don't have the same pull after to watch porn. How this works is not clear, but who cares. It's the understanding of what makes me tick ... (For enough arichus on this to get to the moon and back, see yosefs thread) that's important, so I'm not bothered by the why's as long as I get the how's.
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 10:31 #303578

  • will Succeed Beh
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • I'm an Addict-I Surrender Lust to G-D-I'm powerles
  • Posts: 205
  • Karma: 11
Hi Brothers, I had another fall yesterday morning,
I spoke to my sponsor yesterday night for about an hour (i introduced myself with my real first name!).
Did help me alot, he said i should go to live meetings, and gave me the number of someone in my town thats on the meetings.... i took the courage and called him up - a nice Heimishe guy, i told him my first name and he told me his, he said he'll put me in contact with the guy who is in charge of the newcomers.
I am nervous about going and meeting real live people, but i feel that im not my control any more, so i'll do what it takes me to be sober! and after all we are all in the same boat anyway! 

I'v also learnt from speaking with my sponsor and as well to that guy, that there is nothing to be ashamed that i'v got this addiction / disease, its something that Hashem gave me, and he'll help me fight this as well.

LOL thanks for all your support!
BE"H WE WILL ALL SUCCEED
My Thread
Mini Community
טאטע! אפילו איך שפיר זיך ווייט פון דיר, אוי אוי אוי
ווייס איך אז די ביסט נאנט צו מיר אזוי, אוי אוי אוי
מיט ליבשאפט ווי אן איינציג קינד, פון בענקשאפט א טרערעלע רינט
ואהבת עולם, אהבת עולם אהבתיך

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 10:38 #303579

  • Singularity
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • To write, or not to write?
  • Posts: 1507
  • Karma: 78
will Succeed Beh wrote on 19 Jan 2017 10:31:
Hi Brothers, I had another fall yesterday morning,
I spoke to my sponsor yesterday night for about an hour (i introduced myself with my real first name!).
Did help me alot, he said i should go to live meetings, and gave me the number of someone in my town thats on the meetings.... i took the courage and called him up - a nice Heimishe guy, i told him my first name and he told me his, he said he'll put me in contact with the guy who is in charge of the newcomers.
I am nervous about going and meeting real live people, but i feel that im not my control any more, so i'll do what it takes me to be sober! and after all we are all in the same boat anyway! 

I'v also learnt from speaking with my sponsor and as well to that guy, that there is nothing to be ashamed that i'v got this addiction / disease, its something that Hashem gave me, and he'll help me fight this as well.

LOL thanks for all your support!

as in Laugh Out Loud or Lots of Love?

Either way, I really hope you grow in the meetings. They are my chemotherapy. I hope you have similar experiences.
"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his sobriety level?"
"... It's over NINE-ZEROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

One day... At A Time :-D


Introduce Yourself and get a free karma point from yours truley!
My Thread

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 11:02 #303581

  • LifneiHashem
  • Current streak: 735 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 216
  • Karma: 18
Keep us posted! 

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 12:06 #303584

This week starts Shovavim, which is special for doing teshuva and being mitakane the pagam habris.
I'm taking it seriously this year with real actions (bli neder):
learn more Torah, say the long Arizal version of krias Shema al hamita, and fast at least once.
Now's the time. I'm ready to change and grow and fix up this mess I've gotten into.
I appreciate those who are really trying to help me. I definitely need all the help I can get.
Just like I've written concrete things I've tried, if you can give me concrete, well-defined things I can actually do that will help me, then I will do them (again, bli neder). 
Ideas so far from the 90-day thread:
Read Chovos HaLevavos Shar Bitachon - I can do.
It's heavy and slow reading, especially if I read it with an eye
to incorporate and apply the lessons, but I can do it.
Read the attitudes and perspectives 21 or 30 principles,
and really think about it and try to incorporate the lessons - I can do.
Get daily chizuk emails and read them the same way - I can do.

But, introspect and figure out underlying reasons why I feel the need to escape and self-soothe,
and then figure out how to meet those needs with some other fulfilling (but not destructive) activities,
sounds nice, but I don't know how to do it...so it gets filed away under "nice idea in theory" but I can't act on it.
Reaching out for help.

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 12:18 #303587

  • Hashem Help Me
  • Current streak: 2918 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4058
Reach out and speak with people if you arent doing so yet. Forums are great but it doesnt match personal connection. Also find other stress relievers like exercise to replace this form of self soothing. Stay with us. You are going to make it with Hashem's help
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Group 196 19 Jan 2017 15:48 #303623

  • stillgoing
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1700
  • Karma: 157
Singularity wrote on 19 Jan 2017 10:38:

will Succeed Beh wrote on 19 Jan 2017 10:31:
Hi Brothers, I had another fall yesterday morning,
I spoke to my sponsor yesterday night for about an hour (i introduced myself with my real first name!).
Did help me alot, he said i should go to live meetings, and gave me the number of someone in my town thats on the meetings.... i took the courage and called him up - a nice Heimishe guy, i told him my first name and he told me his, he said he'll put me in contact with the guy who is in charge of the newcomers.
I am nervous about going and meeting real live people, but i feel that im not my control any more, so i'll do what it takes me to be sober! and after all we are all in the same boat anyway! 

I'v also learnt from speaking with my sponsor and as well to that guy, that there is nothing to be ashamed that i'v got this addiction / disease, its something that Hashem gave me, and he'll help me fight this as well.

LOL thanks for all your support!

as in Laugh Out Loud or Lots of Love?

Either way, I really hope you grow in the meetings. They are my chemotherapy. I hope you have similar experiences.


Most people dread chemo. Do you find meetings that hard?
BIG SHOT!
Free Choice?!
Yirai's Memories
STORY TIME :)

Dr. Seuss - You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking) (The Rebba R' Bards)

613stillgoing@gmail.com
Last Edit: 19 Jan 2017 15:51 by stillgoing.

Re: Group 196 20 Jan 2017 07:52 #303712

  • Singularity
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • To write, or not to write?
  • Posts: 1507
  • Karma: 78
stillgoing wrote on 19 Jan 2017 15:48:

Singularity wrote on 19 Jan 2017 10:38:

will Succeed Beh wrote on 19 Jan 2017 10:31:
Hi Brothers, I had another fall yesterday morning,
I spoke to my sponsor yesterday night for about an hour (i introduced myself with my real first name!).
Did help me alot, he said i should go to live meetings, and gave me the number of someone in my town thats on the meetings.... i took the courage and called him up - a nice Heimishe guy, i told him my first name and he told me his, he said he'll put me in contact with the guy who is in charge of the newcomers.
I am nervous about going and meeting real live people, but i feel that im not my control any more, so i'll do what it takes me to be sober! and after all we are all in the same boat anyway! 

I'v also learnt from speaking with my sponsor and as well to that guy, that there is nothing to be ashamed that i'v got this addiction / disease, its something that Hashem gave me, and he'll help me fight this as well.

LOL thanks for all your support!

as in Laugh Out Loud or Lots of Love?

Either way, I really hope you grow in the meetings. They are my chemotherapy. I hope you have similar experiences.



Most people dread chemo. Do you find meetings that hard?

Interesting insight. OK. Chemo with a good hit of morphine. 

Recovery is fun
"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his sobriety level?"
"... It's over NINE-ZEROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

One day... At A Time :-D


Introduce Yourself and get a free karma point from yours truley!
My Thread

Re: Group 196 22 Jan 2017 20:47 #303847

  • shua73
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 263
  • Karma: 7
HHi everyone. How's everyone doing? Thread isn't dead I hope
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: Group 196 22 Jan 2017 21:02 #303850

  • shua73
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 263
  • Karma: 7
SO I'll share my day with you. My kid fell asleep in my bed last night and was shifting around for a while. Hence I didn't get much sleep. After waking up early, learning with chavrusa, and davening, I came home and watched my kids. After .... I was super tired so instead of doing work on my computer (didn't want to risk slipping, almost slipping, falling or any other similar thing.) After waking up and still being tired I decided to daven mincha before working. After mincha I read stuff from the other threads .. and now started working. I haven't worked much and the days almost done but I succeeded. That's what's most important to me.
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.

Re: Group 196 22 Jan 2017 23:29 #303859

Thread is not dead.
I may fast tomorrow and call Dovid Chaim during his group call.
Everyone needs to find their way. I get that. 
But there still must be a short list of less than 10 things that people have done
which have really helped them succeed long-term. Not sure why people are 
not freely giving me their list. Someone suggested that not everyone thinks in terms of lists.
Not really an answer...but whatever.
You can rest assured, that when I finally succeed, I will tell you exactly what things helped.
And hopefully, some of them will help many other people  !

(Shua I responded to your Sharei Teshuva reference, and great job succeeding so far today)

Re: Group 196 22 Jan 2017 23:34 #303861

  • shua73
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 263
  • Karma: 7
Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 22 Jan 2017 23:29:
Thread is not dead.
I may fast tomorrow and call Dovid Chaim during his group call.
Everyone needs to find their way. I get that. 
But there still must be a short list of less than 10 things that people have done
which have really helped them succeed long-term. Not sure why people are 
not freely giving me their list. Someone suggested that not everyone thinks in terms of lists.
Not really an answer...but whatever.
You can rest assured, that when I finally succeed, I will tell you exactly what things helped.
And hopefully, some of them will help many other people  !

(Shua I responded to your Sharei Teshuva reference, and great job succeeding so far today)

TThank you. Also I may write strongly but it's just bc I feel strongly about what I'm writing. It's nothing personal. I'm still rooting for you to succeed.
smile

You can't make everyone happy, you are not pizza.
Time to create page: 0.77 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes