Lol ok this response is overdue.

So after struggling to think of a breath pun I couldnt do it... So I decided to go outside, think things over and get some fresh air.

....wawa waaaaa



Anyhow I havent read the white book. I dont want to say I will because I have an entire bookcase of things to read that I havent gotten to yet.

I would love to speak to the good doc' let me know when hes back.

Gibbor I want to address that point you make. First of all yes, absolutely Hashem is running the world and he can "pick you up" so to speak which is what I feel happens in Israel for a lot of guys that start learning. We get picked up by Hashem and then Hashem drops us into the real world and says ok now learn how to do that on your own. And lest you think Im an apikores thinking for myself, Rabbi Akiva Tatz says the same thing in the Teenagers Guide.

I was coming more from the perspective that you have to take action and not play the victim. Ive done that too often where I sit around and mope or feel sorry for myself. Ask Rabbeim for my solutions (because they know best) and its pathetic. Hashem doesnt want us to become people that arent individuals who can think for ourselves. But quickly I want to point out that Im just speaking from the other side of the spectrum obviously you need guidance in life and of course you can ask a rebbi for that guidance. But guess what G-d didnt make the Rabbi the only person born with a brain. We all have brains so we can use them.

And using my skills and abilities that G-d gave me doesnt mean I dont recognize where they come from. I simply mean that "self- reliant" means that you are the action taker not waiting for someone else to come along and save you. Which btw is what every one on GYE does. Rarely does someone swoop down and solve our problems for us. We all take some action.

I used to think like you gibbor but I was drowned in a lack of self identity, Everything I did didnt matter, and everything I didnt do also didnt matter. Who cares it has nothing to do with me anyways.

So thats that.

Now about me- I was clean two weeks for the first time in a LOOOONG time and wow I forgot what it was to be normal. Life was enjoyable and I was present with family and friends, socially I was a lot better and my skin was a lot tougher (insults and harsh words didnt affect me..)

I did that by focusing on one goal at a time. My problem was that I had too much free time. I had free time because I was overwhelmed from the things I needed to do. So I decided to focus on one thing at a time (on my to do list) and I managed to keep busy for days. Then I finished what I could on that project and had to start the next one. But I got overwhelmed again and couldnt focus and didnt make the time to make a list of what needs to be done. So after 3 days of watching tv (pathetic I know) and barely hobbling along on the things I needed to do, then I got sick and spent another couple of days in bed I finally fell.

Interestingly though after being clean for two weeks I was able to do nothing (my kryptonite) for several days before I fell. After I fell the first time I fell again the past two days one after the other. And now were on day 3.

Whats the system your working, Dr.?

Thats all for now. Happy holidays

I think you misunderstood me. I wasn't advocating waiting for someone to come and save you. You used the words self-reliant, and said that it was the basis for self-esteem. That struck me the wrong way, but you may have meant something different by those words, so perhaps I misunderstood you.

I would like to remind you to take a DEEEEEEP BREEEEAAAAATH!


JustKeepGoing
Wow! Incredible! Apparently you need to focus on one goal at a time and make a list of what needs to be done!

JKG

While I am also not sure I understood you either, but it did sound like some things I have been advocatin' - God 'allows' us to make decision; He helps us in these problems, but it is our responsibility to get ourselves out of it....or somethin' like that.
Is that somewhere near what you were sayin'?

b'hatzlachah