thanks GS
a gut yur

Hi Chevra,

Wasn't here for almost 4 years, I have b"h been working the SA program.
Have been to hundreds of face to face Meetings conventions and weekends.
Life is not the same, I have never believed that I have the chance of leading a happy normal successful life.

It works if you work it, so work it you're worth it. 

In fellowship,
Isaac

56,589 wow what a number!!!!!!!!!!

Wow Mazel Tov!
Thank you so much for coming back, it’s such a chizuk to see someone who was matzliach.

May you have continued Hatzlocha,

YeshivaGuy

My mind is telling me that i should give in to my natural urge.
it will release the toxins and free me from the bad feelings.

OUCH

2nd-chance wrote on 23 Aug 2021 23:11:

Think about what the bad feelings are and what they’re coming from. Identify and name them.
Maybe reach out to a guy on the phone, and keep in touch.

Hatzlocha buddy!

YeshivaGuy 

Day 12

Over 11 years have passed since I joined this forum! I am still trying for another 90 days. Not fully giving up yet. Can you imagine that?!!!

I am committing to work on my growth minimum for an hour (with meetings, member chats, trauma work-thru) on a daily basis. I Will keep this commitment for this week.

Truth to be told I was requested/suggested by a very important person in my life - that cares deeply for me - that I work thru my trauma negative memories/emotions for an hour each day. I did find online advice to do this a memory at a time. I can/should hire a professional to guide me thru the process.

I know I need to be in touch with members every day, I believe that a meeting every day will help me enormously. In addition I have this request to work on the negative memories daily. These all can add up to 3 hours a day which is a lot and this type of commitment brings me close to a failing again.

I have very big trauma from trying and trying to no avail, the pain of failure is imbedded deeply in my gut which usually causes surrender before trying rather than try and fail AGAIN.

I am so desperate that I am committing for this week and will share the work and results in this thread.

The current cycle started 21 Adar 1, 30 days will be on 21 Adar 2. I promised myself a coffee device for the 30th day, hoping that this will help strengthen the incentive for my child-part.

I know I would benefit from a sponsor that will guide me thru the 12 steps which I am avoiding because I know how much I need them.


Plan days 12-18.Neg MemMeetingMembersSpon/12sSunMonTueWedThuFriשבת

			wrote this msg

57848

Day 22 
Withdrawal is tough.
I am completely nervous. People stay away from me for our good.

I called a friend and asked him to sponsor me.
It was not too easy for my ego, he is younger, joined program years ago thru me. He was sober for 3 years.
Now I have a few days more than him (that help - or destroys - me).

He dropped his sponsees when he fell and he will ask his sponsor if he can do it.

Guys who do courageous things, and put shame and embarrassment on the side in order to do what it takes to break free, seem to get that extra dose of syatta d'shmaya and get out of this rut. In addition, maybe Hashem is rewarding you for helping your friend by having him be the shliach to assist you. You have a part in his 3 years clean buddy. Hatzlacha.

Almost 60 days
This is amazing that my HP helped me get on the track before yom tov.
Now i am enjoying my family much more than previous times.
We are spending more time, and i am mostly calm.

Thanks you Hashem

With a new start i am on day 21.
Week 8 in ISTDP therapy.
day 3 of pivotal course.

will try to engage mostly with ebooks without video for my health

Almost reaching another 90 days 


when was my last time? 
i will check that out 

60311 v

Keep up the great work!!

i actually made it to the WALL of HONOR

MAZEL TOV!!! Keep it up tzaddik