I don't know about "wasting my time"
At the end of the day in the past 7 months of this struggle the longest streak I had was ironically without a filter. Obviously a filter is the smartest move and thanks to yiftach I will be putting one on today bh 
About hhm I sent him my number and I'm waiting for a call bh

Anyway today is the first day clean bh 
And I feel amazing about it this time 
I meet yiftach in person and it was absolutely extraordinary experience he also gave me the book "the battle of the generation" and also a new propose to win the fight I feel amazing bh and tbh I'm a little worried about when the motivation comes down but then I'll just take it one day at a time just like today, like they always say to stay clean for forever is hard but for today is extremely possible and if it's truly just for today it might even be easy.

2nd day clean
אמור מעט ועשה הרבה

So what's the plan this time? 


Option 1) Hope for the best?
Option 2) reach out to some of the pros here?

What if I told you I'm doing both
I meet in person with yiftach(one of the greatest things I've down)
I spoke to hhm and hopefully a will speak on the phone 
And also got a filter thanks to yiftach!

Spoke to HHM and Yiftach?! You are well on your way! Amazing!

rocky21 wrote on 30 Oct 2024 21:53:

Ok so you are in great hands. 
If I were to say that HHM saved my life, my marriage, and more, I wouldn't be exaggerating! 

May Hashem bless you and give you strength 

Day 3 clean bh.
I started reading the battle of the generation bh

Buddy, you're an inspiration!
#KOT

You’re in great hands ! Accountability is key.

Hatzlachah

Day 4 clean I really feel amazing bh
The thing that's trying to pull me down is that last month I made a shvua that if I fall I have to give a lot of money to tzdaka but I completely forgot about it and only remembered after the fall so know I'm very down that I'll have to pay it and literally like have no money this month like actually 

rocky21 wrote on 01 Nov 2024 12:00:

Perhaps you could talk to a Rav about the options and get guidance on how and if it's a good idea to make a new shvuah. 

Hatzlacha brother! Really inspiring how how you keep fighting and will beat this.

I seriously wish I was close enough or felt comfortable enough to talk to a rabbi about this 
I seriously am so frustrated because I was just trying to prevent myself from falling and now that I'm on a new journey bh I still feel pulled down because of this shvua thing that I have to deal with 

rocky21 wrote on 02 Nov 2024 16:16:

Please speak to HHM. 
Don't make these decisions without speaking to the boss. 
Alot of our issues come from anxiety and stress. Adding a shevuah on top of our already fragile brains, may just make things worse. 

rocky21 wrote on 02 Nov 2024 16:16:

You could try asking in a general sense. Without details: I made a shavua not to do something and I completely forgot and I did it. What should I do?
Only if you are comfortable. 

Shavua Tov Brother