Another wet dream this morning this might have been caused by seeing somthing on someone else's device at work unintentionally but I am not sure still kind sucks.
that makes 3 of them oh well 

I know its the same day I wanted to elaborate on what bothers me about wet dreams while I don't count them as a failure in my 90 days they do affect me mentally and physically as well as spiritually. And the urges come back. So it sucks when I have to start over with that again.

Personally I have no problem with wet dreams. It's the wet waking up that really annoys me

Day 14: the first 8 days felt faster then the last 3 but that's okay. Kept myself busy I only see this when I think about the 90days.
I also started going to the gym today.

Harav Notezy, 
First, keep up the good work of posting, you will get to see how much it matters as you go along. 

Regarding your problem with wet dreams, i tottaly understand that, It botherd me a great deal as well. But, there are so many things to do for that. Ill write a few.

Reading Krias Shma, especially from the Arizal. 
There is a sefer called Kedushes Yesod and it has a lot of kavanos to have while reading krias shma. 
Learning before going to sleep. especially Mishnayos
Not eating heavy food before sleeping
Doing kegel exercises which strengthen the muscles down so you will have more control.

The most important thing is to ignore them, its not your fault usually and just go to the mikva and move on. 

Good luck.

Day 15 I am struggling a bit with motivation 

notezy wrote on 08 Feb 2024 13:16:

We are rooting for you!

notezy wrote on 08 Feb 2024 13:16:

Here are some great tools that might help...
app.guardyoureyes.com/toolbox/motivation 

we are here for you - stay strong! 

Thank you I did some more F2F I haven't done so in a while I feel more in control now. 

Edit: ending the day now feel like
I got back on the rails about to go to bed ending day 15.
which means my new goal will be 20 days 
And happy rosh chodesh adar 1 to you all good night 

Day 18 update I had a wet dream last night but still going strong.

Today is 19th day.
mondays are always the hardest because its my day off and i have more free time.
Struggling a bit right now.

So what is your plan to make today productive and non-triggering?

notezy wrote on 12 Feb 2024 10:03:

Here's a warm hand.
There's powerful recognition in writing that free time makes you struggle. Feeling unproductive and less purposeful, and having time to "space out" and feel opens up the gate to negative energy. Can you put structure and positivity in your day to counter?   Reach out to a friend?

Hoping your day goes well,
Chaim

Day 19 I had a fall today. 
I read your msgs. But I didn't do enough.
i had a dr.appointment this morning and when I got back I didn't go straight back to Yeshivah like I should have. Lead down a path and here I am after falling.
Not sure what I am going to do next. 
I got farther then I execpted to... 

notezy wrote on 12 Feb 2024 14:39:

i feel you,
having very tuff day too,
superball blues,
always very erotic.
#שנהיה לראש ולא לזנב