Just fell and I don't know how I'm ever going to make it to 90 

You can do it!

Hashem wouldn't give you a test that He didn't know you could pass!

Yeah don't give up so quickly...
Look around at other threads, see what worked for people.
Did you read the GYE handbook? It really changed my attitude to this whole struggle. Find it here

You will succeed if you try! Falls are part of succeeding.

Keep us updated.
Hatzlacha!
HappyYid

My friend, I just checked your register date. You just joined. This isn't a get rich quick method. Join GYE and boom! cured. It takes time. Learning and fighting. Falling and getting back up. It's a process. You mist stop thinking about 90. It's too intimidating. Take it day by day. You will see success. 

Hi yankeesrock!

Falling is part of the process and almost everyone can relate to how you feel now..... hopeless.

your not a hopeless case at all its very possible to get out of this.

Keep it one day at a time....one urge at a time and before you know it you will be in a place you never thought possible
mind sharing abit more of your story and what you have been trying?
Dont ever give up! 

yankeesrock wrote on 08 Apr 2021 01:23:

I heard the Yankees manager asking the same thing. Do you think the yankees we can get past 90 this year?

yankeesrock wrote on 08 Apr 2021 01:23:

I'm going to echo the sentiment from people above, One Day At A Time (ODAAT).
For me, ODAAT includes 2 things:

1. The task seems insurmountable of never ever masturbating or watching pornography etc. again. So let's focus on being clean and living life today and then deal with tomorrow when it comes.
2. It isn't about our streak, if there are 2 people. One who goes 500 days, but then falls and goes on a masturbation and pornography binge for 3 months straight. The other has 3 streaks of 175 days and but the falls are only once and then they get back up. Which of those options are a better option? I'd say the second.

(This is obviously not to say that falling is good, but 1) we're not perfect and falls may (or will) happen 2) Our goal should be to live life and not be consumed by this)
Other people also use it as a tactic for pushing off the Yetzer harah. You can say that I'm just focusing on being clean and living life today and if I fall tomorrow etc. that's a future my problem. Or something like that. I don't find that I need/use this often.

To echo R Grant (never a bad move) its going to take some time to improve yourself to the point where you can really take this shmutz out of ur life for good. In the meantime if you already fell id advise using that to your advantage and using how bad you feel now to strengthen yourself to try to do better in the future

yankeesrock wrote on 08 Apr 2021 01:23:

If you focus now on 90 it will be almost impossible to get there.. Like when climbing a steep mountain, if you look at the top, you'll fall down but if you concentrate on each step, you'll get to 90 and way beyond that with the help of Hashem!
Keep strong!