Not sure what makes you say that? Could you explain a little more why you think that's the case? To me it seems that the embarrassment is not the source but rather an outcome. Overcoming the embarrassment might lead me to recovery but in of itself is not the source. I mean when I started this thing many eons ago I didn't think that the reason I was doing it was because I would be embarrassed when recovering. If you could explain a little  more I would appreciate it 

JoyOfLife wrote on 03 Aug 2018 13:27:

Sure. Your vision of the world which causes the embarrassment is likely also the cause of the feeling which for all intents and purposes seems like regular sexual desire. When you use behaviors which are not consistent with that vision of the world, then that vision starts to change. When you introduce yourself at the meeting and share your dirty secrets that's not consistent with that vision. You watch your own action and rationalize it and learn from it. And initially it hurts. But good things sometimes hurt like a son of a gun.

It will only really make sense when you see it for yourself. Words are always filtered and interpreted.

I'm a little embarrassed to post this but once again I fell. I'm doing a cheshbon of sorts to make sure it doesn't happen again. Definitely need to call someone and simply take the next step

Pick up the phone and call - you wont regret it.