Thanks Shlomo simple and down to earth 

missed you on the non call this week...

There was a non-call! 

Yeah I only found out sunday but I tried every 1/2 hr ....

MayanHamisgaber wrote on 19 Apr 2017 21:33:

Sorry.

Wasn'tI there an email?

There was.

Thanks, Shlomo

Inspired by this, I will make a commitment b"n to try and keep my glasses off at all times where I'm not at my computer or with my wife at home. Or other safe places like shul etc.

I battle with it, ah but it's just a walk up from shul on a quiet road, ah, it's just the kiddush, ah, ah ah, ooh.

So I should just make it an absolute rule. It would help a lot. 

Also I'm trying an SA meeting tonight PG

I think I know the other guy from that meeting. 

cordnoy wrote on 19 Apr 2017 22:12:

NP there was an email but I wasn't by the comp. so didn't see it till sunday....

Baruch Hashem, I have managed to surrender a little better these last two days.

I went for a run after 2 weeks of sick-keit. 
I am in a night kollel! That pays! BH!!!-- It's part of the "God Grant me the ... courage to change the things I can...."

And morning learning was not fluid at all. And I gotta learn somthin' 

Keeping pace. Trying to be grateful and assume my role in the world, calmly, a father, husband, son.

A few points:

Friday night, after ping pong with the kids (switching beds, putting to sleep) all night, I felt I reached an even deeper level of surrender, that this is my tachlis right now. It brought a lot of serenity and the next day was wonderful.

Someone complimented me on my learning Saturday night and my first reaction was NOT to be overly-humble, but to say "BH He gave me a good mind, and I've put in lots and lots of effort, too". The honest humility is a non-trigger, and I like it.

At the SAA meeting last night, I resolved the word "should" is toxic to me. I try live in the reality of the now, and try consider any situation not as good or bad, but simply what is actually transpiring. Then I hope I can be unbiased in going into real issues. 
My addict lives in what should be right now. What I should be doing and how things should turn out. There is no should. There is just is.

You should have success remembering this.

Singularity wrote on 02 May 2017 09:12:

Thanks for the share. Beautiful thought. A real goal for all of humanity. Imagine the stress free world we would live in if everyone attained that. Many of our gedolei Yisroel were real examples of that. Their awesome yishuv ha'daas was very much due to their deep belief that Hashem wanted them to focus only on what He wanted from them at that particular moment. By the ones i was zoche to meet, it was as if time stopped when speaking with them. It was as if they had nothing else on their minds at that moment.

I love the point about should. I have friends who are obsessed with not saying the word. Their saying is "we avoid should statements." Me being me, I go to the opposite and deliberately say the word should around them. Or I'll point out where the literature says the word should.

Shlomo24 wrote on 02 May 2017 13:19:

Funny...
128 times

GrowStrong wrote on 02 May 2017 13:33:

Should can be a tyrannical word- because we have so many shoulds and it makes us feel bad. But should we get rid of should so we should not feel bad? Aren't there things that we should do? Shouldn't we say that we should?