I have my own little narrative on Dov's "nuclear reset" idea.
You see, tomorrow I turn 90 (days). Since this is something we celebrate here on GYE, I'm confused why I feel a little down.
I figure, I've got the Pesach blues (or peach blues, in my case). You see, this is my first pesach being a serene sober. In the past, comes Rosh Chodesh Nissan and I would tell myself "you don't want to go into pesach looking like this! You better do teshuva". So I would. And I'd come into pesach on a spiritual high, well prepared and very into the holiday.I would already envision myself staying in this sublime state through sefira and Shavuous. Of course it didn't last, but for pesach I was on a high.
Not this year though. I'm kinda easing into pesach this year. No highs. Is a little depressing. But I gather this is the way it's supposed to be. It's normal living. No complaints at all.
But it aint so easy for a feller like me to be normal!