---I tried to put this in the guidebooks category but didn't have permission, so here goes nothing--

One time years ago when I was really struggling I mentioned to my then-therapist a story I had read in The Battle of the Generation [edit: my bad I was actually talking about the book called The Battle of [i]Our Generation] (if I remember correctly, I was presenting it positively, like, "Look isn't this cool?") but he like shook his head disapprovingly. Basically the story was about this chasson and kala who, when they got to the yichud room, the chasson told his new kala that he had been clean from p for the past 5 years and she cried tears of joy. This is extremely impressive. However, my therapist disapproved because (iirc) he didn't see it as a healthy thing to be pushing in the face of people who are in the thick of it. Kind of like gedolim stories.

Are there two camps on the quality of this book on this site or does everyone pretty much give it their haskama?

Edit: so yeah not talking about same book. mb

Shalom Brother,

Edit: It has been pointed out the this story is from a different book.

I think you need both things. A few inspirational stories provides hope and a glimpse of what can be accomplished. Like the before and after pics of people that lost weight . . . ish. I didn't think this is a focus of the book at all - most of it is mussar. 

As a side point, I kind of disagree with the message from that story. It is the chosson who ought to be crying the tears of joy. 

That being said, different things work for different people, so the book may not speak (read?) to everyone - even if it had site-wide haskomo.

Hatzlacha

This story is in a book with a similar title The Battle of Our Generation which is unaffiliated with GYE. The book says shmirat habrit and not porn but I still don't see how it is fitting to say this in the yichud room.

It’s a different book. 

radiantfox67 wrote on 30 Aug 2024 01:05:

The story has an offensive odor, and I hope nobody takes it as inspiration and surprises his Kallah in this manner.

To be precise, I think the story stinks.

The book is writing it as a true story. I could maybe see it playing out this way when the groom and bride were OTD and returned. I still wouldn't suggest even for such people to imitate the person in the story and I don't think it is appropriate. The book wasn't giving advice that we should do this. The only point the book was trying to bring out with this story is that being clean is very important for a healthy marriage which is true.

wow