I have been on here for 2 to 3 years, I have posted from time to time, and have a small thread and BB corner. I am hoping to really get out of things and hope that this will all be part of it.
I have been on here for 2 to 3 years, have posted from time to time, and have a small thread and BB corner. I am hoping to really get out of things and hope that this will all be part of it.
in short, for the time I have, I didn’t grow up religious, obviously exposed to everything out there, became frum 13/14 and stopped with M and P. But still Struggled whenever on the Internet with looking at inappropriate pictures. It wasn’t like I started off like that, but it would be searching around, looking at the news, some thing caught my eye and I ended up looking at all different things. By the time I was 17 I was getting into learning a lot more and really wanted to break out of this. I stopped using Internet pretty much entirely. That was the solution and it was amazing. Afterwords I was in Israel and again everything was great. Got married my wife used Internet without filter and I wasn’t able to change that, but for the first few years I avoided using it entirely. But then one thing led to the next started with downloading. By the time I was 17 I was getting into learning a lot more and really wanted to break out of this. I stopped using Internet pretty much entirely. That was the solution and it was amazing. Afterwards, I was in Israel and again everything was great. Got married my wife used Internet without filter and I wasn’t able to change that, but for the first few years I avoided using it entirely. But then one thing led to the next started with downloading shiurim then, getting email, then using it to look into information. And then got back into old habits. Due to different struggles in marriage there were times that I would look up information with images blocked but still ended up seeing things from time to time. This has been going on for almost 10 years. Over the years I have significantly upgraded filters which has been a big help. Also, this website has been a big help. Also being in touch with HHM for an hour two years and having him for accountability has been a big help. I am trying to reach out to more people recently which I also feel helpful. Another thing is trying to have solid learning every day. Staying connected. Another thing is limited usage of the Internet. I’ve got my Internet off in the evenings because I find when I am tired and relaxing with the Internet it’s very dangerous.
Another thing is trying to have solid learning every day. Staying connected. Another thing is the needed usage of the Internet. I’ve got my Internet off in the evenings because I find when I am tired and relaxing with the Internet it’s very dangerous.
After all this, I still have ups and downs sometimes within the same week. Either typing in words to see what search bar will show. Or on the shopping site and typing and things to see what it will show or if you can find anything. Similar if I got access to anything with the stock photo images. I have times where I am very strong and avoid ay site that I could risk getting into trouble, But there are times that due to circumstantial situation I have a need or I think I have a need and then I get Lax in being careful as needed. Also, there are times where if I really wanna get into trouble it’s not hard with whatever limited access I have. Yes I have truple but it’s not enough.
I hope that posting here in the more public way will help me move forward with stopping.
also hope and daven the zechus of helping others along the way of my posting will provide the siyata dishmaya to make it as well.
I am making a goal that between now and shavuos I should be clean of any searching for trouble.
