Can relate sorry יסורים של אהבה
Took me a long time to move on. A lot of crying to hashem. A few years later I stopped shuddering when I heard the town she's from. Now that I write this a few years after that even I realize my kids babysitter has the same name as her and she didnt even cross my mind until now ... And shes just a girl now its OK.

Its rough , but keep on hanging in there don't do dumb stuff I really really feel your pain. 

To relate to a woman in a way that she is desiring and enjoys one connecting to them, listening to them, caring for them, is the shoresh of the yetzer nashim that mankind has. So remind yourself just to connect with her in anyway your mamash touching upon the tenuah of being בא על הערוה. Any connection especially if she’s gone through trama and craves attention and love is terrible. Keep it up and stay away!!!