youknowwho wrote on 05 Dec 2023 21:08:

What are you waiting for?? Before I blocked YouTube I thought the same, but if you don't change anything, nothing will change, in order to get to there you need to go a little bit out of your comfort zone, jump into the cold waters (speaking to myself as I still need to change things too), with Chanukah coming up it could be a great moment, don't let it pass. (If I'm pushing you too much just flush).

Lets do this together!

Please keep us posted.

Rooting for you my dear hero!
True self.

Expecto Patronum!! (It’s possible that mine takes the shape of a phoenix. Or maybe HHM) 

Now you can come out. The dementors are all gone. 
How are you, Chaver ? Miss your insight and illumination.. Freilichen Chanuka. 

chaimoigen wrote on 11 Dec 2023 17:14:

Thank you, chaimoigen.

Oddly enough...lately, my Patronus seems to be wearing a bikini…

No, I did not call anyone. (though I do love all of youse!)

Didn’t exercise (hence, my “dad bod” beer belly is still fully intact)

Didn’t read anything (I probably should read TBOTG)

Not taking a cold shower. (Yeow!)

Was not in the mood of all that.

I was in the mood of being alone.

What I did do is take a lonely and solitary stroll in the Forbidden Forest to talk to my Father and beseech Him to give me clarity...

In the words of vehkam on a lonely thread of mine a while ago:

"Perhaps share your struggle with your Creator. He is always with you, even when you want to be alone. He created the struggle and He is rooting the hardest for you to overcome and grow from the experience.”

Thanks to all of you for your continued support, seen and unseen, heard and unheard, it means the world to me!!

Vehkam says it best. 
That stroll sounds achingly lovely. 

Speaking of timeless, immortal literature, there is a wonderful Frog and Toad story in where Toad is frantic with worry because Frog has left him a note that he wants to be alone. Toad thinks that Frog no longer wants to be friends. I won’t spoil the story, for all who have not yet read this great work by Arnold Lobel.  
But at the end, Frog and Toad both sit on the small island in blissful quiet, enjoying being alone together….

Okay, Reb Chaimoigen, I actually had to look that up and actually must share this wonderful story!

Here goes:

Alone

Toad went to Frog’s house. He found a note on the door.

The note said, “Dear Toad, I am not at home. I went out. I want to be alone.”

“Alone?” said Toad. “Frog has me for a friend. Why does he want to be alone?”

Toad looked through the windows. 

He looked in the garden. He did not see Frog. 

Toad went
to the woods. 

Frog was not there. 

He went to the meadow. 

Frog was not there. 

Toad went down to the river. 

There was Frog. He was sitting on an island by himself.

“Poor Frog,” said Toad. “He must be very sad. I will cheer him up.”

Toad ran home. He made sandwiches.

He made a pitcher of iced tea. He put everything in a basket. Toad hurried back to the river. 

“Frog,” he shouted, “it’s me. It’s your best friend, Toad!” 

Frog was too far away to hear. Toad took off his jacket and waved it like a flag. Frog was too far away to see.

Toad shouted and waved, but it was no use.

Frog sat on the island. He did not see or hear Toad.

 A turtle swam by. Toad climbed on the turtle’s back.

“Turtle,” said Toad, “carry me to the island. Frog is there.He wants to be alone.”

“If Frog wants to be alone,” said the turtle, “why don’t you leave him alone?”

“Maybe you are right,” said Toad. “Maybe Frog does not want to see me.
Maybe he does not want me to be his friend anymore.”

“Yes, maybe,” said the turtle as he swam to the island.

“Frog!” cried Toad. “I am sorry for all the dumb things I do.
I am sorry for all the silly things I say. Please be my friend again!”

Toad slipped off the turtle.
With a splash, he fell in the river.

Frog pulled Toad up onto the island. Toad looked in the basket. The sandwiches were wet.
The pitcher of iced tea was empty.

“Our lunch is spoiled,” said Toad. “I made it for you, Frog, so that you would be happy.” 

“But Toad,” said Frog. “I am happy. I am very happy.

This morning when I woke up I felt good because the sun was shining. I felt good because I
was a frog. And I felt good because I have you for a friend. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to think about how fine everything is.”

“Oh,” said Toad. “I guess that is a very good reason for wanting to be alone.”

“Now,” said Frog, “I will be glad not to be alone. Let’s eat lunch.”

Frog and Toad stayed on the island all afternoon. They ate wet sandwiches without iced tea.

They were two close friends sitting alone together.

End

Am I the only one out there smiling like an idiot after reading this?!

Yes, I assume you are the only one..
I didnt smile at all.

I’m smiling like Frog who is not lonely! 

The stories are immeasurably better with the illustrations. 

Alas. No sharing of pictures on GYE.  

youknowwho wrote on 13 Dec 2023 18:15:

Same here! Thanks for sharing the story!

ChaimO needs a bibliography for all his posts!!!

It would be nice if I had an island to go to whenever I wanted to be alone... I guess I'll have to settle for my car-man-cave or the basement...

foolie wrote on 28 Nov 2023 18:17:

I need to add what ive only just discoverd.....
@Foolie is without any doubt "Moaning Myrtle"

foolie wrote on 23 Nov 2023 02:24:

At the risk of being completely gauche I will quote myself and point out that if anyone was paying attention I clearly stated that if I’m going to be a compared to a book character it’s Peregrin Took not Moaning Myrtle 

Just saying. 

And for all you of who are going methinks he doth protest too much, to you I say in the language of the hippies whatever dude

Et tu Brute?

foolie wrote on 19 Dec 2023 19:18:

THE DUDE ABIDES!

foolie wrote on 19 Dec 2023 19:18:

I've been meaning to do some housekeeping here, but was laying low in the forests of Albania.

Sorry to disagree, dear chancy, but foolie is Severus Snape.

"​Clearly, Life sucks and then you die, Mr Potter…"

And Gevurah Shebyesod is hereby Stan Shunpike. (His idea, actually. Bloody brilliant!)

"Take 'er away, Ern!!!"

The Monster Truck...is actually the Knight bus. 

"ERNIE! LITTLE OLD LADY AT 12 O'CLOCK!"

Dear Friends,

I just want to share some thoughts. I can really use some chizuk…

Yes, it’s true that I am approaching 200 days, b”h, I have a lot to be grateful for!!

These past few months, I’ve had my ups and downs. I’ve been through stress, loneliness, anger and many other triggering emotions.

Yet somehow, I felt a certain peace, a certain pride in being a GYE member. I am growing, changing, I am on the path to holiness!

Even though I’ve had many slips, it still felt like I had a certain clarity.

Not so as of late…

Recently, I am undergoing unique stresses and turmoil. And I have found a slow and steady collapse of the pride, the paradigm of growth I so tenaciously clung to.

Dark and twisted thoughts, my old, comfortable friends, hiss within my mind…

Women are beautiful. I objectify and fetishize them. Can I really live a life without feasting my eyes on the beautiful sights, as I have for so many years?

Stop this nonsense! Who are you really fooling?

I allowed you to play your silly games for a bit…but now, it’s time to get back into my hot, vise-like grip of endless lusting and cravings, an endless pursuit of empty pleasure that will never ever fill me up, never ever truly satisfy…

I have found myself lately muttering the dirty things of the thousands of scenes I’ve watched.

I am slipping into yiush and despair. I knew it wasn’t really possible!!

My davening is virtual nonexistent, my learning the same, as I sit with hollow eyes over the Gemara, frozen, re-reading the same lines again and again without comprehension.

Yet here are many heroes. You all are. You inspire, encourage and emphasize. You are all a beacon of light and hope to me.

I’m just not really feeling that vibe right now…

I don’t think I’m in danger of falling just yet, but this attitude is scaring me. I am fearful of how close I am to finding my old self again. I sure don’t want that…

Thank you all for listening!

Youknowwho

Excellently written - Patience buddy - keep doing what you are doing; we slowly elevate ourselves more and more.