youknowwho wrote on 28 Nov 2023 20:59:

Try sending a PM to some of them, they may not be so hard to reach.

chaimoigen wrote on 29 Nov 2023 20:08:

I love it! from now on im Neville Smallbottom!

Gosh! What a thread – I will IYH return in the near future with 32oz coffee and read every word slowly.

Dear youknowwho, I’m truly impressed at how you expressed yourself in your first posts on this thread – so real and honest. So raw.

Wow you really put me back in the Hoshana Raba mode…

Brother, what you’ve done is phenomenal! My heart truly hurts reading about the confusion, abuse, and trauma you’ve experienced. But the way you’ve worked on yourself is stunning.

161 clean days doesn’t come from drinking 32oz coffees. It comes from hard and exhausting work.

Kudos to you for making these changes in your life, its not easy but you are a wonderful person that has made wonderful progress.

Keep it up, never give up, keep climbing,

My Dear friend, Reb YKW, I loved your post. So much heart, so beautifully expressive. Your in the league of the great Rosh Yeshiva, Reb CO Shlita. You are an inspiration to me and to all the people coming here!
I know I'm changing the topic a little, but if I may. As an educator, maybe some people will think I'm nuts, but I talk about death from time to time. I will remind my charges from time to time that we are here for a visit, and then we'll go up to Hashem, and we'll reap the rewards of what we worked on. First of all, I think it helps them deal with their mortality and mortality in general in a healthy way. It's not something I get worked up about, it's something we can mention, we can remember, and it's not taboo. We talk about it in a nonchalant way. As per Rabbi Miller, we also gain that we remind them (and ourselves) that there will be a day of reckoning. Never mention gehinnom in regards to them. But from time to time mention that "the reshai'm that did this massacre" and the like are burning in gehinnom, and Hashem is punishing them etc. 
I hope I'm right that these students will come away able to talk about death without it putting them into freeze mode
Either way, please keep posting, sharing, and inspiring!

Friends.

I really appreciate all your kind words of support, it strikes a chord so deep within me, I wasn’t even aware that place existed.

Thank you.

Just one thing, Reb Eerie I think comparing me to CO is a mistake, his sheer gadlus in comparing you to Dobby is incomparable! 

Another point. Chancy/Neville, as I started reading your post about upper and lower Gan Eiden, bodies and souls, I suddenly noticed a curl of wispy smoke above my temples. It seemed to be originating from my ears… A faint smell of burning flesh pervaded my nostrils…

Then, it hit me.

My brain had caught fire.

So, I think I’ll need to store your post away for a different time, I hope you won’t mind!

A good thing about all the talk about death is that we seemed to have summoned Big Moish from hibernation, a big shoutout to Big Moishe’s path to taharah!

So long for now.

I was comparing your talent to write to Reb CO. And btw, you guys still owe me an explanation. What on earth is a Dobby? And what's it got to do with me? I remember when my friends were reading Harry Potter, I couldn't bring myself to get involved. I still don't think I missed much, besides for reading some English woman's utter fantasy and folly, but I do wish I knew what Reb CO meant.
Dear Rosh, is there a piece of Reb Chaim that explains this? Reb Baruch Ber? Reb Shimon?

eerie wrote on 30 Nov 2023 23:57:

Ahhh, thanks for clarifying, for one glorious moment my ego got ahead of itself!

We need Reb CO to explain the virtues of Dobby, but rest assured, its a compliment! 

You are not missing out on anything, no worries

There is no talented writing that can have the sheer emotional impact and pick-me-up that a (virtual) hug from Eerie has in it. It packs quite a punch!!!

R Eerie, you don’t begin to know the extent of what you can do for a guy. Especially if he was feeling a little lonely and lost … trust me, I know. 

The HP books are great. But they are narishkeit, that can sometimes serve a purpose.  Friendship and chizzuk, on the other hand, mixed with an healthy dose of common sense and a huge juicy dollop of genuine caring - these are golden rays of goodness, and the delicious chicken soup for the Neshima that also fuel the engines of future monster-trucks. 

Gut Shabbos!! 

Chaim Oigen

foolie wrote on 29 Nov 2023 19:38:


I doubt we'd run out of characters that quick. For those (like me) who've said things they wish they could have back: 'Never forget Wizard Baruffio, who said 's' instead of 'f' and found himself on the floor with a buffalo on his chest.' - Professor Flitwick

jackthejew wrote on 03 Dec 2023 04:37:

Jackthejew, thanks for the laugh! And thanks to Hechochma for some exclusive unwinding material!

Now that I’m here, I might as well say it as it is…

“Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs”

"I solemnly swe@r that I am up to no good…."​

Rabbi Voldy (Im trying different names for you, since youknowwho is too long)
I didnt mean to set your brain on fire, trust me, I barely scratched the surface there. All I wanted was to give you a little taste of the unknown.... It doesnt do to dwell on loss and death as nothingness, it makes all of this seem pointlessly painfull and painfully pointless. So I wanted to show you there is some much going on after death, we cant even comprehend! So no, we are not gone once we die, quite the opposite, we come alive! 
Now regarding the HP books, I belive its a great thing, Or it was great for me, the only time i didnt think about lust was when i read the HP books. It pure fantasy but has alot of bravery and friendship and love. I took a lot of those books. One line i still use till today "Of course it all happened in your head, but why in the world would that mean that it wasnt real?"

Voldy, please stick around, we love having you here! Dont go moldy......

I AM I'm sorry to hear all that you go trough 
i can feel your your pain

i can realy relate to your story/ Experience 
 Although i am clean already with watching reel porn on Official sites
i can find myself looking for good romence movies and in the end i find myself 
watching like p*** on a movie i don't feel any Guilt  at the time watching but sometimes i find myself after that with Guilty feelings
like why did i did this
i try in the last few days not to be online in the late night hours becuse then i have most of my urge's coming up i find only one real help that help me 
this is speaking to hashem not only at a Specific time 
more like any time have a urge if i have my mind on the spot i would say
"totty i know i am powerless aginst the thinks that i am thinking or what i wanna look 
i am asking for your help without you i can't do anything so please help me i should be able to get thorough this challenge"

most of the time its helps but without that its a 99% that i will let my urge's to became realty 

so i am wishing you the best 
and i keep you in mind
we are all in the same struggle 
but with GOD'S HELP WE CAN GO THROGH THIS  

youknowwho wrote on 03 Dec 2023 05:56:

I trust that your version of “no good”, Tom, is one that merely manages mischief, not one that inflicts soul-tearing harm…

Remember, “Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light”…

שלמה1 wrote on 05 Dec 2023 17:02:

Reb Shloimeh,

Thanks for the heartfelt post, I appreciate it!

Regarding watching movies, I totally relate to the struggle! I’ve gone through many (sadly, inappropriate) titles the past two years, binge watching till the wee hours of the morning.

It always starts with the mind claiming it needs to unwind, and ends up with guilt, wasted time, or even worse levels of acting out. 

Though, as of the past many months, I haven’t watched any movies, and am happy to report that I haven’t died of my injuries (yet, maybe it’s harder to kill Voldemort?)

These days, when my emotions are harassing me that they need to unwind, I indulge them with the fascinating and informative voice of David Attenborough of BBC Nature.

The only side effects of this rather fascinating show is that as I watch the Great Yellow Bellied Lizard stride effortlessly across the rivers surface, I find myself falling asleep much earlier than I would have in the old days….

There's still much work to do. I need to delete some nasty stuff that I’ve purchased in the past that’s still lurking in my watchlist library. Not up to that yet. We'll see.

chaimoigen wrote on 05 Dec 2023 17:08:

Moldy Voldy.

Chancy, I like that! Nice ring to it.

Mischief Managed, Reb CO, no worries! I unwittingly ran into Professor Snape in the corridors...