You. Are. Amazing!
Dont for a second think otherwise..... Most bucherim have some sort of struggle or other in this area. But most dont think or dont care to fix it untill it gets a habit and its too hard to fix then. THey think itll be fixed once they get married which of course is not true it just ruins their marriage as well! 
So Tzaddik you are very lucky that you have what it takes to fight this now and you are able to keep up the fight for long periods of time. 
Dont overthink it. You are normal and this is a normal desire.
One piece of advise i can give you. Every time you get a desire to look as something inappropriate be it live or on a computer, think to yourself, Do I really want more of this stuff in my head? Isnt it hard enough to fight with the garbage that i already have there? By looking and giving in, you are just growing your YH and you will have a bigger YH going forward! Its that simple! 
This is very effective as it will make you in charge and give you a good reason to not give in because nobody wants to work harder down the road. 

Stick around and post. 

B"h that has been my only slip for Bein HaZmanim, and we'll keep it that way, going back tomorrow! I had HHM be an accountability partner and I've mamash had incredible siyata d'shmaya! The Yetzer Hara tried hard to get me over the last days of yontiff, but B"H I made it through, the accountability helps for so much! Thank you everyone for the chizuk, and I hope to continue posting and have continuing success! 

BentchKvatcher wrote on 17 Apr 2023 09:14:

I don't exactly know what this is supposed to mean, could someone explain it please?

Markz wrote on 17 Apr 2023 11:30:

markz had me laughing there.
though maybe he meant you should join a metzuyanim yeshiva? dunno

Markz wrote on 17 Apr 2023 11:30:

It’s for those [Scary] mainstream Va’dim (spelling) one only gets frightened by in mainstream Yeshiva’s.

(Just thinking back has me thinking everyone was looking at me..) 

Hey EC, happy to hear you ended off the Bein Hazmanim on a positive note. I want to wish you Hatzlacha on the new zman. Stay strong and keep posting. We are all rooting for you.

B"h got back to Yeshivah and feel super amazing about my major accomplishment over Bein Hazmanim, I'm so amazed that I managed! Thank you everyone for all of your chizuk, it helped so much!

Crabapple18 wrote on 18 Apr 2023 04:56:

B"h never had issues like this, I absolutely love my Yeshivah!

Hello everyone again, an interesting question. 

B"h, when I'm in Yeshivah I really don't have any problems, and I hope to keep it that way, my problems are only when I'm at home, or sometimes if I'm away from Yeshivah. It almost feels like I'm putting my struggle on pause until next time, not that I'm having success for everyday I don't do anything at Yeshivah. B"h, I feel more accomplished with a accountability partner, but basically feel the same.

So, how do I feel like I'm still progressing when I feel like I don't have an issue in this matzav? I want to work on my myself and continue making myself stronger! I also think that this will help for when I go home, so I feel more on fire.

Please let me know what you think! 

EccentricComposer wrote on 21 Apr 2023 01:12:

When away from your triggers - at home or away from yeshiva - aside from porn and masturbation, are you still fantasizing? Do your eyes still roam?

B"h, I really don't fantasize when I'm away, only very rarely and its much easier to pull myself away. Also, it's much easier to keep a check on where I'm looking. I still have trouble sometimes, but its much easier to control, B"h.

EccentricComposer wrote on 21 Apr 2023 01:12:

Excellent question. I think for a bochur, when you're in Yeshiva and (thankfully) not being tested in this way during that time, your focus has to be on your learning. The more you progress in learning, the more of a shmirah it will be when you're home and do have the Nisayon. Just as an example, if you try to complete the Masechta that the Yeshiva is learning, you may have a perek to fill in Bain Hazmanim and that drive to get to the end and make a siyum will keep you focused and out of trouble. Generally, when people fall into the bad stuff, they're not feeling great about themselves overall. If you are able to build yourself up during the zman as a masmid, as someone who has goals in learning that they want to accomplish, this will carry over during Bain Hazmanim. Using your time during the zman to strengthen yourself in learning is not at all "putting your struggles on hold," rather it's actively fighting it with "בראתי תורה תבלין".

Thank you so much, I've never really looked at my learning in that way, this is quite a chizuk!

I had the same experience.
For a few years was completely clean in Yeshiva, but struggled when I would come home for Shabbos or break.
My experience is different that the previous reply, but like you said the issue was just put on hold, for some reason the setting made the Yetzer Hora go away.
The issue was still there in its fullest.
Even when the Yetzer Hara is not active we still need to deal with him in order so he should not come back when he has an opportunity, like when going home.
I agree to you that we need to change and grow. Yes we need to work on ourselves, and when the Yetzer Hora is on pause it is an opportune time because we now have an edge over him.

EccentricComposer wrote on 21 Apr 2023 01:12:

I had the same experience.
For a few years was completely clean in Yeshiva, but struggled when I would come home for Shabbos or break.
My experience is different that the previous reply, but like you said the issue was just put on hold, for some reason the setting made the Yetzer Hora go away.
The issue was still there in its fullest.
Even when the Yetzer Hara is not active we still need to deal with him in order so he should not come back when he has an opportunity, like when going home.
I agree to you that we need to change and grow. Yes we need to work on ourselves, and when the Yetzer Hora is on pause it is an opportune time because we now have an edge over him.