Hi everyone, I've been on gye for a little more than half a year.
my journey to becoming clean started over a year in yeshiva in ארץ ישראל. Before I get into that, let me introduce myself,
I grew up in a less yeshivish family, but not modern. Ive been struggling with זרה לבטלה and po*n since i was 12. I also happen to have a very good grasp of technology. Over the years I went a month or 2 without watching but never more than 15 days of not being מוציה לבטלה. As a teenager I always thought that I'll take care of this problem once I turned 20.
i tried a few times to stope before i turned 20, but I always found ways to bypass what others had set up to block me. I also didn't really enjoy my learning in yeshiva throughout those years/ or able even be able to think in learning. When I turned 20 I finally got fed up and started my real fight in my yeshiva I had just joined in ארץ ישראל. ץ. I struggled on and off for a few months, my longest streak was 40 days. After this vicious cycle of struggling, I came back to my yeshiva after that פסח and didnt use my smartphone, ( I used a nokia phone that had call/txt) and stayed indoors for as much as possible for 30 days, it was difficult but I made it through and I also to my suprise discovered that I really enjoy learning and actually have a brain. This streak continued through mid summer when I fell a few days before 90. I got back up after 2 falls and I've been clean since then b"h. Im currently on day 141 b"eh!!!!
from my struggles I noticed a few things:
1) this topic is not discussed enough in the yeshiva world as being as a big of a problem as it really is.
2) for anyone whoe is tech savy, there isn't a single filter you cant bypass. I personally am learning ethicak hacking at the moment and programming. The flaws in the software available is crazy. i have ways for bypassing some of the most recommended filters.
I've had a idea for a little bit but I want to start a version on android that is kosher by design, not frankenstien packaged like a lot of kosher phones on the market. If theres anyone else who is tech savy, I'd like to hear you story and your struggles.
הצלחה!
~ a single non dating yeshiva bochur
(i hope this thread makes sense