NebulaMud,  Thanks so much for the post.  I truly appreciate you opening up like that in order to help me.  Ur a brave dude!

When I say wired please don't take me so literally.  I'm not getting into the nature vs nurture debate.  I kind of think its a bit of both but its irrelevant to me.  I am very familiar with the ideas you expressed (looked into it myself in the past) and some items resonated with me others not but I do appreciate u opening up.  PM me for more details.  And thanks again!

Alex, u do make a good point but its a bit more complicated with SSA.  I think the general approach however is part of the solution

Have a great shabbos everyone!

mynisayon wrote on 04 Nov 2011 17:36:


Not doubting it.  Much more complicated.

But all you can do is all you can do.  So at least do all you can do.  And if you do, Hashem will do the rest.

Its been a while since I posted.  I know I should really post every day but I get busy.  Of course there always seems to be time for Porn unfortunately.  Forget about anything else. The amount time wasted is incredible.

I have had some falls but I am feeling better now.  As you know from my previous posts I kind of blame my behavior on my condition (SSA).  I've been thinking about it and it really is a cop out.  Sure its hard but still need to accept my situation and not make excuses.  I need to take responsibility for my own actions.  I have a habit telling myself that other guys don't get my challenge but truthfully our struggles are more alike than different and I need to feel that we r all in this challenge together.  I can't do it alone.  The other guys here get it no matter what the fetish is. 

Its a great family of guys here supporting and caring about each other.  I finally realized that each guy has his fetishes and others here may not get that particular fetish but in the end its all lust and lust is something we all get.  Its great not to deal with this alone!  Thanks!

Sums it up beautifully.
I'm sending all the new SSA guys to this thread, so look good for the camera!

Seriously, you're doing tremendous work here teasing apart this nisayon into workable parts.

Thsats great, you said it straight.

one of the biggest things Iv got out of GYE is that we can be honest and give up fooling ourselves, whch weve done for sooo so long.

I find my relationship with my wife is a lot better, but it feels great to be clean for 3 weeks plus, aiming for the month ....here we come, one day at a time...

Your bro, HY

I think there has to be a distinction between people with Unwanted Ssa and people that choose to be gay and make peace with it.  For people like myself that have unwanted ssa and desire change in their lives then change is possible and know that your not alone for people that decide that they are gay froma place of integrity and they are really serious with themselves and have weighed their options then allni say is good luck to you.

For a person with ssa i think that it is just another manifestation of their insecurities and issues.  Just like other people become alcoholics drug users, and gamblers. Their own "stuff" manifest in this lustful way. And just like beating alcoholism and drug abuse are able to be held so is ssa.

I dont beleive there is a genetic predisposition. What is genetic how ever is personalities

Blessings

Take a look over here drsorotzkin.com/articles.html#Sexuality . He's got a lot of good stuff on a variety of topics.