hi All,

i have just registered myself on this site and would like to introduce myself, (hope thats standard here)

i grew up (?) in orthodox family in Brooklyn, went to Yeshivah etc... i'l skip to the part that really matters to this post, when i was 18 my mind was filled with all kind of movies, tv shows, and more importantly unethical, uncensored stuff that the internet is filled with these days, anyhow i needed to do something more so i became hooked with woman, mostly were married, and i went on like this for 3 years having the time of my life... but then 1 very fortunate day i got a wake up call, i saw myself in a very deep mess i realized what kind of things i was doing to myself and to others in the process,  it became clear to me how much i have sinned to Hashem and as much as i wanted to stop after a while i fell right back in where i was just a few short months before.

so finally i met a wonderful therapist with a real 'Vareme Yiddishe Hartz' who understood me completely and helped me get through the addiction faze that i had, and BH after 2 years of intense 1 on 1 therapy, as well as group therapy i became 'clean' and still am to this day 1 year later .

i am here today because i don't attend meetings anymore, and as of late it seems to me that my mind if spiraling back to a few years ago, i donno if this is something new or it has just been there for all this time just covered up with some thick glue which is melting now.

i hope to read and write and most importantly get helped here with advise, courage, and personal experience from all of you.

thank you

Tzadikel.

WELCOME!

You are not alone.  I am B"H clean for over 2 years, but don't consider myself "cured".  I don't think we get cured.  You are in a good place.  Stick around.  You will be surrounded with warmth, love, caring, and understanding.  Not to mention some really talented and funny chevra!

Wlcome Tzadikel! Climb on the truck, it's gonna be a great ride!

Gevura!

Welcome to our community, you have finally come home!

We're all in the same boat here. Tzuras Rabim Chatzi Nechama   Once you've arrived, there's no turning back. Everyone here will just grab a hold of you and pull you up with them!

GYE Program in a Nutshell: (Right Click the link and press "Save Link/Target As" to save the PDF file to your computer).

'Guard Your Eyes' offers a unique approach to helping people by recognizing that there are many different levels in the struggle for "Shmiras Ainayim" and "Shmiras Habris". After studying the experience of hundreds of religious strugglers over the past few years, we put together the suggestions and recommendations that we feel are best for the various levels. We divided the tools, features and services that GYE offers into 8 different levels. This "GYE Program in a Nutshell can help people quickly identify at what level of the struggle they are at, and which tools and features would help them most at their particular level.

Here are some quick things you can do to help you jump straight into recovery:

1) Make sure to install a strong filter. It will be almost impossible to break free of this while having all the garbage within a mouse click away. See this page for one good filter option, along with instructions on how to install it best – and give away the password to our "filter Gabai"… See this page for another 20 (or so) filter ideas and information… We also highly advise installing "Reporting Software" such as webchaver.org to give you some accountability, because filters alone are usually not sufficient and they can often be bypassed.

2) Join the daily Chizuk e-mail lists to get fresh chizuk every day.

3) Scientific studies have shown that it takes 90 days to change a neural thought pattern that was ingrained in the brain through addictive behaviors. Did you join the 90 day chart on-line? Sign up over here.

4) Post away on this forum! You will get tons of daily Chizuk and support. This disease can't be beat alone. It works best when you get out of isolation!

5) GuardYourEyes also offers many free anonymous phone conferences where you can join a group of other frum Yidden, along with an experienced sponsor. See www.guardyoureyes.org > Tools > Phone Conferences for many different options. Our conferences are taking place every day, morning, noon and night… Joining a phone group would be a tremendous step in the right direction for you and help you learn freedom from this addiction. Not only will you learn the secret of the 12-Steps – which is known to be the world's most powerful program for beating addiction having helped millions world wide, but the daily call will be another way of GETTING OUT OF ISOLATION and connecting with others who are going through what you are.

6) If you need more general guidance, write to our e-mail helpline at gye.help@gmail.com or call our hotline at 646-600-8100.

7) Download and read the "Guard Your Eyes Handbook". This handbook outlines the GYE approach in detail, and makes our network much more effective and helpful for people. The handbook has two parts:

A) The first part, "Attitude & Perspective", details 30 basic principles to help us maintain the proper attitude and perspective on this struggle. Here are some examples: Understanding what we are up against, what it is that Hashem wants from us, how we can use this struggle for tremendous growth, how we can deal with bad thoughts, discovering how to redirect the power of our souls, understanding that every little bit counts, learning how to bounce back up after a fall, and so on and so forth…

The second part, "The 18 Tools", detail suggested tools and techniques, in progressive order, beginning with the most basic and fundamental approaches to dealing with this addiction, and continuing down through increasingly earnest and powerful methods. No matter what level our addiction may have advanced to, we will be able to find the right tools to break free in this handbook!

May Hashem be with you!

thanks all for the warm welcome, haven't felt loved in a while. i hope that today is my step into a new era i my life, an era where i will be able to share and ask for advise from people living in my community , who will understand my struggles and shortcomings.

All of us here have similiar issues, the details might be diffrent. But, a lot of us including myself, havn't reached a year yet. You did amazing stepa and you were able to keep it up for a full year. That's a lot. Keep it up.

We all love you as a brother. Keep on posting and things will get better.

Look around of how much we have to offer here. A bais homedrah, a fun place, what not ?

Keep on trucking and posting.

read my post "GUE ruined my world" to better understand what i meant by saying that i am CLEAN for one year, nothing to be proud of, believe me.

Tzadikel Yossele wrote on 19 Aug 2011 01:00:
Dear chaver, I searched for this post you refer to here and could not find it. Enlighten my darkened eyes, bro.

here you go, Dov: www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=4338.msg115382#msg115382

When i saw you were 'clean' for a year. I was very excited and respected you very much, i read through your post and i still respect. You really would like to be good and you suffer from a addiction like all of us. So, stay intake advice foirm everyone here, follow it and soon you will see yourself fighting the same areas as all of us and hopefully be a year "clean" with the real definition of clean (as described ta the 90 day chart rules).

Love.

Keep on trucking.

Thanks Obbormottel. May you never be ovverbottul!

;D

dov wrote on 19 Aug 2011 19:30:

thanks for the brocho. Pleasure to be of service to the Great one.

Indeed, aren't we all of service to Hashem? Af she'eish bo'oh min haShomayim, mevi'in eish min ha'hedyot!