Shalom and Hello,
Just ended a six month clean run after the "week from hell" (divorce and big job promotion) the whole six months wiped out ! Iam now about to rebuild.....out of bricks this time, not straw !

Kvetched.

Hi kvetched I am so glad that you are not kvetchy about your fall.6 months wow amazing accomplishment.Such an experience,is a breakthrough performance.I am so excited that I joined the forum to be able to meet people like you.

Why thankyou Mechazek,
Iam not feeling too good about myself at present. The "double whammy" was a shock and I took a knock. However Iam fighting back. I have joined this site and am reading a shed load of books too !!! There is always hope!

kvetched wrote on 16 Jun 2011 20:39:


Welcome Kvetched.

At a siyum we say אנו עמלים והם עמלים אנו עמלים ומקבלים שכר והם עמלים ואינם מקבלים שכר

The question is asked, what does this mean אינם מקבלים שכר, don't they work and get paid?  The answer is that if someone builds a house and if when he comes to get paid, the house falls down he wont get paid, even though he put in a huge amount of effort to put it up.  With learning torah (and other ruchnayis matters) it's different.  You can work through a sugya, prepare a whole shuir based on it.  Someone then asks a question that destroys the whole chiddush, you still get schar because its the עמלות the effort for which one gets rewarded, even if it produces no results.

The same is true here.  For six months you kept clean you will get schar for that and that can never be "wiped out."  It 's the constant working on ourselves that's the key.  Regardless of whether we ultimately succeed.  Indeed, the "effort" for you now is to get up and keep on working, despite the fall.

Hatzlacha.  You've come to the right place.

Bless you Ur-A-Jew, that was a lovely thing to say and has already got me resolved to work at this !

Hello/shalom, feeling good today. My world almost collapsed due to this addiction. I have learnt something.

glad to hear your feeling better.It is so crazy that when we are in the throes of lusting we are obsessively thinking about it and we have no life what so ever.but still when we see that trigger it causes that automatic chemical reaction that makes us thing we are finished and just must give in,it has to be like that  otherwise we never would of had that thought or looked at that site or felt that feeling of desire.

That is so right Mecha, I know that the trigger is stress and I know that when the stress builds I have to be up front and face it...AND RESIST IT !
Your'e a nice bloke Mecha !

Welcome Reb Kveched!
Thanks for sharing your positive attitude with us.  Divorce is certainly a nisayon that shakes a person to the foundation.  Sounds like you're building yourself a solid foundation this time around.
Share your progress with us!
Alex

Good luck.

--Eye.

thank you.what is bloke?it sounds like an word for an englishman.

It is indeed Mecha, it means "genuine male" !

oh thanks.Why is it that stress will cause me to lust?

any background?  what kind of addiction are you facing? 
keep up the healthy attitude.  and remember the value of humility.

mechazek wrote on 21 Jun 2011 11:23:


Because stress, when it builds up, is pain.  Lust is a pain-killer.  It's an escape, too.

--Eye.