An update:
As of the last 2 weeks, I’ve been struggling a lot. Today, I failed, I really
tried not to, I really did.
I managed to go 38 days, then failed, then 2 days and now failed properly. But I won’t give up, I can’t give up, I feel terrible, but I’m going to go into Yom Tov tonight with Emunah and Bitachon and say to Hashem that I accept his Torah, that from today, I will do my best but I need your help tatty.
I can’t give up, I can’t ruin my life, I don’t want to ruin my life. I want all the benefits of being clean. I will succeed no matter how many times I fall, I will succeed.