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TOPIC: Proposal number two 4732 Views
Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 17:46 #416325
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Talking to a bunch of the chevrah about what we can do to best help the people out there suffering, the following thought evolved.
There are many bachurim, or even yungerleit, who struggle, and they don't have regular access to internet. Maybe they struggle with masturbation, or phone lines, or other unhealthy behaviors. And they also need help. There are those, probably precious few, (besides for Muttel's talmidim, that is  ) that have a rebbe that they can talk to. Among the yungerleit it's even less common. They are uncomfortable, and understandably so. Then, there are many rebbeim that are doing a wonderful job at helping their talmidim. And there are talmidim that wish they had such a rebbe.Another point One of the most powerful things in this place is the fact that we all in the same boat, we all understand each other's struggles because we readily admit that we have been there ourselves. And together, we hold hands and soar. Now, how can we offer that to the people that for some reason or other cannot come here regularly? So, there was a thought of some of the people here together creating an anonymous hotline. A place where people can call to speak to someone that has been in a similar place, a place where a person can get a mentor that really understands him, and can offer him real help. Of course there are many details to work out, like who are the mentors? How are relationships monitored and run a way that will only be helpful? And many more. We would probably have to set up an operating system where people are connected only to mentors not in their hometown, etc. The hotline could also be a resource for rebbeim etc. looking for tips on how to help their talmidim Now, before you go, I want to share something. I had discussed this idea with one of the special guys here on Erev Shabbos. And I wondered how such a thing would look. Just a few days later I got to try out in real time, and it is currently working wonders. There is a wonderful person here who has been doing his own work of spreading awareness of what GYE has to offer. He's been doing so in BMG. And got over 20 calls from people wanting to know more. A few days ago a guy called, but this was someone who our tzaddik was uncomfortable speaking to. He asked me if I could call this yungerman back. Which I did. I got to know a really special yungerman, a real ben Torah, who's been struggling for years all alone. Has hardly heard about GYE, and had no idea what it's like. And he has no regular access to internet. He still has enough to struggle with, unfortunately. And I have had the zechus of guiding him, of showing him how he can get past all these behaviors. He's BH on fire and I daven he'll keep soaring. My friends, Hashem gave me taste of what it would be like to help people that don't know the culture here, that haven't read any threads, that don't know about the F2F program, and most importantly, that don't know there is a way out. And we can change that. Again, please share your thoughts. ותושיה ברוב יועץ |
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Feel free to say hi. My email is 1gimpelovitz@gmail.com
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 18:25 #416330
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טאטע טאטע טאטע איך וויל זיין, יא איך וויל זיין, א ירא שמים |
Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 18:45 #416331
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I absolutely love this idea (
 ), however I have a ha'ara that would obviously have to be worked out.The idea of making a phone call is something that absolutely terrifies lots of people. So, although someone who has no other technology other than his phone has almost no way of getting help other than through his phone, it may be mighty hard to convince people to actually make a phone call. If you can possibly pass around a number for this hotline to rebbeim etc. and they can strongly push and convince talmidim to call that may be an eitza... however from my experience it seems that only a tiny percentage of people have ever worked up the courage to speak to a rebbi or rav. Being a BMG talmid myself, it seems that there is a certain almost attitude against speaking about this struggle. If this hotline were be advertised as an organization, or as something to do with therapists or professionals, my guess is that it may not do that well with the type of yungeleit and bochurim who only have a cell phone. From what I understand, the best way to "convince" someone to call is by advertising in a way that the person is absolutely convinced that he can identify with the person on the other end of the phone. If the person has too many sfeikos about what's going to happen when calling the number he just wont do it. It's not worth the risk. However, if the person is absolutely convinced that the person answering the phone can truly identify with him, in both the fact that he's also a yungerman/ bochur, and that he struggled through this stuff himself, you may stand a chance... Just my "experience"! |
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 19:11 #416335
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 19:21 #416336
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iwannalivereal wrote on 03 Jul 2024 18:45:
I absolutely love this idea ( ), however I have a ha'ara that would obviously have to be worked out.The idea of making a phone call is something that absolutely terrifies lots of people. So, although someone who has no other technology other than his phone has almost no way of getting help other than through his phone, it may be mighty hard to convince people to actually make a phone call. If you can possibly pass around a number for this hotline to rebbeim etc. and they can strongly push and convince talmidim to call that may be an eitza... however from my experience it seems that only a tiny percentage of people have ever worked up the courage to speak to a rebbi or rav. Being a BMG talmid myself, it seems that there is a certain almost attitude against speaking about this struggle. If this hotline were be advertised as an organization, or as something to do with therapists or professionals, my guess is that it may not do that well with the type of yungeleit and bochurim who only have a cell phone. From what I understand, the best way to "convince" someone to call is by advertising in a way that the person is absolutely convinced that he can identify with the person on the other end of the phone. If the person has too many sfeikos about what's going to happen when calling the number he just wont do it. It's not worth the risk. However, if the person is absolutely convinced that the person answering the phone can truly identify with him, in both the fact that he's also a yungerman/ bochur, and that he struggled through this stuff himself, you may stand a chance... Just my "experience"! Fully agreed . Its gotta be be people who not only went through the same thing, but are also open to talking about their own experiences A therapist /professional only knows j=how t olisten not how to share |
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May you slide down the banister of happiness and get many splinters of success up your career
Feel free to send me an owl, a howler, or even a Crumple-Horned Snorkack to Iamredfaced@gmail.com The Red Face |
Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 19:30 #416338
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iwannalivereal wrote on 03 Jul 2024 18:45:
I absolutely love this idea ( ), however I have a ha'ara that would obviously have to be worked out.The idea of making a phone call is something that absolutely terrifies lots of people. So, although someone who has no other technology other than his phone has almost no way of getting help other than through his phone, it may be mighty hard to convince people to actually make a phone call. If you can possibly pass around a number for this hotline to rebbeim etc. and they can strongly push and convince talmidim to call that may be an eitza... however from my experience it seems that only a tiny percentage of people have ever worked up the courage to speak to a rebbi or rav. Being a BMG talmid myself, it seems that there is a certain almost attitude against speaking about this struggle. If this hotline were be advertised as an organization, or as something to do with therapists or professionals, my guess is that it may not do that well with the type of yungeleit and bochurim who only have a cell phone. From what I understand, the best way to "convince" someone to call is by advertising in a way that the person is absolutely convinced that he can identify with the person on the other end of the phone. If the person has too many sfeikos about what's going to happen when calling the number he just wont do it. It's not worth the risk. However, if the person is absolutely convinced that the person answering the phone can truly identify with him, in both the fact that he's also a yungerman/ bochur, and that he struggled through this stuff himself, you may stand a chance... Just my "experience"! OTOH, many people who "went through" the struggle are not qualified to help others. Yes, they can lend an ear, give chizuk etc. But there's just a handful of people on this site who are qualified to act as a baal eitzah in this inyan. The responsibility of telling people what to do on a phone call like that is pretty heavy, and just because someone got clean doesn't mean they know how to shatz up someone's real problems based on a phone call, or know how to talk to people the right way. You're basically asking for one of like 3 people in the world to take on answering this hotline. |
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Links: TBOTG (and a peirush); F2F Program; Hall of Fame thread; Dov's 12 Step Workshop recordings; Welcome New Members; Muttel's Bochur Schmooze; The Easy-Peasy book; The Big Book (a pdf version) (and the White); Markz's compilation thread; Accountability relationships;
Me: My trip. Please feel free to reach out. CLICK HERE TO JOIN THE VAAD PROJECT. HERE is an explanation of the Project. |
Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 19:36 #416339
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chosemyshem wrote on 03 Jul 2024 19:30:
iwannalivereal wrote on 03 Jul 2024 18:45: I absolutely love this idea ( ), however I have a ha'ara that would obviously have to be worked out.The idea of making a phone call is something that absolutely terrifies lots of people. So, although someone who has no other technology other than his phone has almost no way of getting help other than through his phone, it may be mighty hard to convince people to actually make a phone call. If you can possibly pass around a number for this hotline to rebbeim etc. and they can strongly push and convince talmidim to call that may be an eitza... however from my experience it seems that only a tiny percentage of people have ever worked up the courage to speak to a rebbi or rav. Being a BMG talmid myself, it seems that there is a certain almost attitude against speaking about this struggle. If this hotline were be advertised as an organization, or as something to do with therapists or professionals, my guess is that it may not do that well with the type of yungeleit and bochurim who only have a cell phone. From what I understand, the best way to "convince" someone to call is by advertising in a way that the person is absolutely convinced that he can identify with the person on the other end of the phone. If the person has too many sfeikos about what's going to happen when calling the number he just wont do it. It's not worth the risk. However, if the person is absolutely convinced that the person answering the phone can truly identify with him, in both the fact that he's also a yungerman/ bochur, and that he struggled through this stuff himself, you may stand a chance... Just my "experience"! OTOH, many people who "went through" the struggle are not qualified to help others. Yes, they can lend an ear, give chizuk etc. But there's just a handful of people on this site who are qualified to act as a baal eitzah in this inyan. The responsibility of telling people what to do on a phone call like that is pretty heavy, and just because someone got clean doesn't mean they know how to shatz up someone's real problems based on a phone call, or know how to talk to people the right way. You're basically asking for one of like 3 people in the world to take on answering this hotline. Maskim to the above point... however not necessarily does the hotline have to be there to give people the entire eitza to get out of this mess. I was envisioning that the biggest benefit are for guys that have no idea that there are other strugglers, and that have no idea that there's actually a way out of this mess. There are probably a decent number of guys on the site that can clarify that point pretty well. Once someone is open to the idea of breaking free with a real she'ifa and hope to get out they can possibly be led to other places... GYE, HHM, or others that can properly lead a guy step by step. There is also the obvious may'la that can be had from talking on the phone with guys and making relationships with others that have struggled just for the chizzuk that provides. |
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 19:43 #416340
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Links: TBOTG (and a peirush); F2F Program; Hall of Fame thread; Dov's 12 Step Workshop recordings; Welcome New Members; Muttel's Bochur Schmooze; The Easy-Peasy book; The Big Book (a pdf version) (and the White); Markz's compilation thread; Accountability relationships;
Me: My trip. Please feel free to reach out. CLICK HERE TO JOIN THE VAAD PROJECT. HERE is an explanation of the Project. |
Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 19:56 #416342
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Feel free to email me at amevakesh23@gmail.com
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 20:07 #416345
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 20:11 #416348
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 20:24 #416351
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 20:34 #416353
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Links: TBOTG (and a peirush); F2F Program; Hall of Fame thread; Dov's 12 Step Workshop recordings; Welcome New Members; Muttel's Bochur Schmooze; The Easy-Peasy book; The Big Book (a pdf version) (and the White); Markz's compilation thread; Accountability relationships;
Me: My trip. Please feel free to reach out. CLICK HERE TO JOIN THE VAAD PROJECT. HERE is an explanation of the Project. |
Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 20:58 #416355
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Motzei Pesach I typed up the following sign and hung it all around BMG. לכבוד אחי ורעי בני הישיבה שיחיו I’d like to share my story with you in the hope that others can gain from it… As a young boy I was unfortunately exposed to the darkest tumah the internet has to offer. I spent many many years struggling, all the while trying to figure out how to break free of the terribly strong grip the yetzer hara had on me. I struggled through my years in mesivta, beis medrash and then as a yungerman here in BMG. This struggle gave me no rest and was a huge weight on my shoulders throughout all those years. Bchasdei Hashem, a few months ago I was zoche to learn the proper way how to deal with this nisayon and I’ve broken out of this terrible cycle that had been going on for more than 15 years. If my story sounds at all familiar, you should know that you are not alone. There are unfortunately many chashuve bnei torah that I know personally, and probably many more that I don’t know about, that struggle with these inyanim. You should also know that it is quite possible to break free. The same way I did, you can as well. I'm kinda hung up on the kind of specific chasid shota that would rip down a sign like that. Totally wondering the same thing, why rip it down? Wow, IWLR, thanks for sharing this incredible hishtadlus. FLOOD THE ZONE WITH MORE SIGNS!!!
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Re: Proposal number two 03 Jul 2024 20:58 #416356
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chosemyshem wrote on 03 Jul 2024 20:34:
iwannalivereal wrote on 03 Jul 2024 20:24: chosemyshem wrote on 03 Jul 2024 19:43: eerie wrote on 03 Jul 2024 17:46: Now, before you go, I want to share something. I had discussed this idea with one of the special guys here on Erev Shabbos. And I wondered how such a thing would look. Just a few days later I got to try out in real time, and it is currently working wonders. There is a wonderful person here who has been doing his own work of spreading awareness of what GYE has to offer. He's been doing so in BMG. And got over 20 calls from people wanting to know more. * * * And I have had the zechus of guiding him, of showing him how he can get past all these behaviors. He's BH on fire and I daven he'll keep soaring. Again, please share your thoughts. ותושיה ברוב יועץ Idk about this hotline idea (not against it, I just don't have thoughts about it. I thought GYE had a hotline at some point, I don't know what happened to it?) But sounds like someone's been doing some great awareness work already. What's he doing and how can we replicate that outside of BMG? Motzei Pesach I typed up the following sign and hung it all around BMG. לכבוד אחי ורעי בני הישיבה שיחיו I’d like to share my story with you in the hope that others can gain from it… As a young boy I was unfortunately exposed to the darkest tumah the internet has to offer. I spent many many years struggling, all the while trying to figure out how to break free of the terribly strong grip the yetzer hara had on me. I struggled through my years in mesivta, beis medrash and then as a yungerman here in BMG. This struggle gave me no rest and was a huge weight on my shoulders throughout all those years. Bchasdei Hashem, a few months ago I was zoche to learn the proper way how to deal with this nisayon and I’ve broken out of this terrible cycle that had been going on for more than 15 years. If my story sounds at all familiar, you should know that you are not alone. There are unfortunately many chashuve bnei torah that I know personally, and probably many more that I don’t know about, that struggle with these inyanim. You should also know that it is quite possible to break free. The same way I did, you can as well. Holy cow. This is really something. You're like a one-man hotline and delegation. Ashrecha. Though I hear that this is hard to duplicate outside of BMG. Why can't it be hung up in the Mir? What about in large shuls? Or what about if they were printed in mass quantities and sent out with some of the weeklies? (BP, Lakewood Scoop, etc. I'm sure they have those in other cities too...) Maybe it can also be strewn all over shuls all over the tri-state area? The Mincha spot on Route 17? I'm not saying that these are all good ideas or at all practical. It's just a start...  Warning: Spoiler! |
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Feel free to reach out and say hi!
proudyungerman@gmail.com 406-219-8398 My Journey: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/406231-The-Real-Me |
