Do what is best for you of course. but what if you stuck around to help others instead of leaving show them the way.

Hi Adam,
Just read your story. I can relate. How are things going? Better or worse? I think I have some ideas that may be able to help. Better to talk, perhaps. 

Adam,

It's amazing to hear about the progress and growth you're experiencing.



I find that staying in touch here, even for a couple of minutes a day, has has a wonderful effect. Besides for the ood folks and great conversations, it's a healthy way to keep awareness "running in the background". Twice I took about a week off, since I joined, and I felt the effect in greater struggles and an ebbing of certain motivations.

A person is strong if he makes sure to achieve his goals, using whatever tools it takes to accomplish it effectively. I think using GYE to keep one in the right zone is not necessarily a weakness.



But whatever works for you, friend!

I am sticking around for sure. I think giving a little distance might help me make the eventual exit a little smoother. I am nowhere near that point right now. I fell YESTERDAY for no apparent reason. I am not in control of this yet. I am making progress and am much better than when I started on GYE. It is frightening to think back to when I was not on GYE, but I am in no way thinking that I have this monster beat. I was just looking down the road.

My private hope is that I will get to meet a few of you guys in person and create a real and lasting friendship—not just one on this secret website that my wife knows nothing about (it's the only secret I have from her, and it hurts) but only through these forums. I think that will help me stay clean as much as almost anything else. I can't imagine having a friend close enough to talk about this issue. It would be amazing.

Despite his many attempts, I still haven't had the courage to call HHH. I have a long way to go. 

As far as helping others, I don't feel qualified to give much help other than an encouraging word or if someone is inspired by my story...

adam2014 wrote on 15 Mar 2024 10:49:

Sometimes an encouraging word and an inspirational story is all someone needs...
On that note, I definitely empathize with the fear of calling/meeting people from here. I'm sure it is amazingly helpful, but it's just too much. I did manage to get over that enough to call HHM. 10/10 would recommend you just do it. 

This is another wake-up call. The moment I say that I am "cruising along," I come crashing down—two falls in a row. It could have been months ago when I was just starting out. The moment I think that I have this under control.. bammmmm! 

I went back and read every post that I have written, and a common theme is that I get a touch of success, feel cocky, and blow it shortly after. Time to reinvest in my battle. Return to the F2F program, read the book, and check my technology to ensure it is secure... Back to basics! 

This time, I am not sad; I am MAD... 

Today, I will be alone for most of the day. Normally, that is tough for me, but not today. I am focused like a laser and going to crush this day.

Dont wrote on 26 Mar 2024 11:18:

Don't get mad - Get even !
This is war !!!

How's it going? Everything ok?

Things are going very well in some aspects and not so well in others. I am doing well in this department, but other issues are keeping me so occupied that I have not even given P&M a thought for the last few weeks. I don't feel that I should burden all of you with my problems.. You guys are incredible and so thoughtful. I want you to concentrate on your own battles and not to worry about mine... Just keep your anonymous buddy Adam in your prayers.... 

It will all work out for the best... Searching for that "hidden good" that it inside of everything that HaShem does.

Hey! Buddy Adam,

I will most definitely keep you in my prayers but hey I gotta know what to pray for ....but please my friend dont burden me with everything at once, we can do once a week or maybe two...I'll let you know when it gets to much brother.

Keep Rollin' and Godspeed,

adam2014 wrote on 16 Apr 2024 13:37:

Glad to hear, and I hope things get better soon. I will definitely keep you in mind in my prayers.

On a personal level, if I only focused on my own battles, I don't think I would be here, on GYE. (I don't think that I would be where I am now on a personal level either.) 

GYE is a community, and I think it thrives on everyone helping each other out. Sometimes we take, sometimes we give, and many times we need both.
Feel free to share your burdens, we are all here for you!

Sharing your burdens and challenges lowers stress levels. It's a very healthy thing to do. And look at the posts. The chevra want to help.

Things are going very well in some aspects and not so well in others. I am doing well in this department, but other issues are keeping me so occupied that I have not even given P&M a thought for the last few weeks. I don't feel that I should burden all of you with my problems.. You guys are incredible and so thoughtful. I want you to concentrate on your own battles and not to worry about mine... Just keep your anonymous buddy Adam in your prayers.... 



It will all work out for the best... Searching for that "hidden good" that it inside of everything that HaShem does.

GYE is a community, and I think it thrives on everyone helping each other out. Sometimes we take, sometimes we give, and many times we need both.

Feel free to share your burdens, we are all here for you!



 True words!

Hang on. 'Tis the month of miracles, and we here have experienced many... 

When one lives in a higher way, he taps into a higher plane of existence. When one experiences Hashem in his life, many thing are possible....  May the doors and fountains of blessing open to you, friend Adam.



Chaim Oigen

HI Guys,

I just wanted to check in and say Hello. I hope everyone had a great Pesach! Life is changing a lot for me, mostly for the better. My battle remains, but I am succeeding much more than I am failing. I have decided to stop counting the days and trying to acquire streaks or consecutive days.
Instead, I am solely focusing on the current day and making the most of it. I am taking that approach to davening, my personal relationships, exercise, and, of course, the battle that brought me to GYE in the first place.

Every day is a gift from Hashem, and I want to enjoy that day to its fullest. I am waking up each morning like it is a special holiday and I am not going to ruin that gift by engaging in activities that would not please HaShem. I am praying with more joy and conviction, I am exercising without worrying about the time and distance and how many steps I am taking. I am enjoying cooking a meal for my wife and sitting in the yard with a good cup of coffee. My work/life balance is better. I do my work to the best of my abilities and then leave and go home and enjoy the rest of this "special day".

I have always tracked everything in my life. I am a numbers guy! I worked out four times this week, have a 10-day streak of staying clean, and spent a certain amount of money this month. Did I pray three times today? Did I eat only Kosher food this week? Everything was tracked and calculated and it made life so uninspired and mundane. 

Now, I will take a walk around the block in the middle of the day without tracking my steps. I will make sure that my next meal is Kosher, I will pray for maybe 45 minutes in the morning or maybe just 10, I am not going to hold myself to these arbitrary metrics. Maybe I will pray Mincha for an hour if I am feeling it, no more, rushing through the words, just so I can say that I did it. I am going to avoid P and M today... because I should.. That is not so hard! And tomorrow, I will say it again... I no longer know how many days clean I am. I was clean yesterday and plan on being clean again today. I will deal with tomorrow, tomorrow! 

I hope and pray that everyone reading this finds a way to make every day as special as mine. Even when I have a bad day, it is just that—a day. Tomorrow, I begin again with hope and motivation to make this day the best day ever!!

Cheers to another great day!!!!

@Adam2014, that was beautiful!! I love the celebrating reach day! 

Create an awesome day!