So it begins.

B"H, I've been זוכה to enormous סיעטא דשמיא over the past year, and there is not a doubt in my mind that much of it (if not all of it) is due to my finally getting serious about beating the struggles that have plagued me for so long. No, I'm not completely free yet (as evidenced by some of my recent posts), and yes, there are still bumps in the road that I need to get over and smooth out, but still, the הצלחה that I've seen in my life recently is truly the hand of God at work.

Now, I don't want to be cocky/overconfident and recklessly charge into the next stage of my life without extreme caution and preparation, but I also don't want to be too cautious/hesitant and lack the confidence I need to take the next step, such that I wind up pushing my next chapter off over again and again until my own self-restraint harms me. Therefore, I feel the time has come for me to start dating. I'm not on the level I'd like to be at in this fight just yet, I don't deny it. But given that I'm in a better place than I've been in for quite some time and have an amazing supporting cast around me, my hope is that with continued סיעטא דשמיא, discipline and faith, I will keep growing during the process to the point where I will BE"H be ready to take the biggest step of all.

If you had told me 13 months ago that I would be in the position I am now, confident enough to say "Let's do this, I've matured & grown and I'm ready to date", I would have laughed in your face. But here I am. And I would never be where I am today without GYE and the support it has given me. For those who are in similar situations and are close to this stage in life, THERE IS HOPE. I'm living proof, בלי עין הרע.

I hope to check in as often as possible, in order to hold myself accountable and stay disciplined and on guard. BE"H, this next step should be with enormous הצלחה, not just for me but for all of my brothers and fellow fighters going through similar challenges. 

May we all be זוכה to הרבה שמחות.

Talk to you soon,
Fighter With Fire

FighterWithFire wrote on 29 May 2023 01:46:

May it go smoothly and easily! 

Amen! Hope is a heady thing. I'm sure that you will experience incredible Siyata Dishmaya!

B"H, first week of officially being "in the Parsha" was absolutely terrific, feeling very calm and confident, B"H. הלואי ויתר.

BE"H next week will be just as amazing and productive!

Have a wonderful Shabbos!

FighterWithFire

Pleased to report that here we are (3 weeks in) and it's been smooth sailing so far, B"H!. Won't go into too much detail (in order to protect privacy) but B"H, the dates I had with the first girl I went out with went very well-smooth and even enjoyable conversation, pleasant company, felt relatively relaxed (after getting over the early nerves/panic, of course). While the dates themselves were enjoyable, we both felt that our personalities were different (I.E., we're both looking for something a little bit different) and mutually elected to move on.

However, I'm still greatly encouraged by this promising start, and hope that it's a harbinger of things to come. Hopefully it won't be too long before I find my אשת חיל (is there such a thing as giving ברכות to one's self? ).

Looking forward to checking in/updating everyone soon. Have a wonderful Shabbos!

FighterWithFire