Sometimes I tell myself I'll just take a peek, see what's there, and then stop, and it won't count as a fall. Now, if I stayed on the page and masturbated right then, I wouldn't let myself get away with it. But I'm cleverer than that. I really do just look for a second and close it. Then the next day I do the same. Just to see what's new! And over the days, my mindset changes, porn starts to seem more and more normal . . . then I fall! Because it takes a few days to catch up with me I can convince myself that a peek really won't lead to anything more.

I thought of this because I was reading the rules for the 90 day chart. If you accidentally see something and close it, that's not a fall of course. But intentionally seeking it out counts as a fall, even if you close it, if I understand correctly. Now I see why. Even if you close it in two seconds, it still reinforces the habit, and it's only a matter of time before you start doing more. It's much easier to never peek in the first place.

The Ohr Hachayim in Acharei Mos writes that as long as one does not stay away from looking, even if he stays away from thinking about it, he will not be able to control himself and rid himself of the inevitable desire. 
See more over here:
guardyoureyes.com/articles/torah/item/the-ohr-hachayim-on-acharei-mos

Thank you for this great source. I was wondering what you think of this part:


It seems like this is very good for someone who is further along the path of repentance, meaning someone who has been clean for a long time and wants to avoid returning to sin. But for someone whose still trying to get out of the muck in the first place, and still feels conflicted, I think this may be counterproductive. If I hadn't been willing to think about my desires and "negotiate" with the Yetzer HaRa to begin with, I wouldn't even be here and I would be falling all the time.

I used to believe in the same lie for a while. It's one of the great illusions of this addiction. Each time you look, you're speeding up the whole subconscious process in your brain. Your neurons on that strong path, that you took too many times, keeps firing like crazy. You brain may later need many days to recover from it and stop sending you images in your head. Resisting does gets easier in time, but I can speak from experience - whenever I peek, regardless of how many days I'm clean, I have much harder battles ahead. Do yourself a favor here and don't fool yourself.
Look at the wisdom from tool 1, when I realized that I've been deceiving myself here, it helped me a lot:


You may try what I sometimes do: next time you feel you need to look, only for a tiny second, leave your device immediately, stand in front of a mirror, close your eyes, take a few deep breaths and then look yourself in the eye and say: it's only an illusion, following it will lead me to pain, I refuse to follow it.

Oh and by the way: you're 15 days clean, that's a really great result & congratulations on level 4! I'm standing next to you with the same result. Keep up the battle, great warrior, I'm praying for you today.