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Should we face women or not?Because
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TOPIC: Should we face women or not?Because 1539 Views

Should we face women or not?Because 24 Aug 2017 03:11 #319250

  • Unknowngye
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I believe I saw written in the White book (sexaholics anonymous) that we must not be afraid and hide from women but go out and face reality, because otherwise you're just avoiding the problem. How do we understand this being that we need to be shomer Einayim as well?
A good example of this is when coming leaving yeshiva, an isolated environment in which women dressed modestly, and seeing revealing women on the streets. 

thank you, 
yehonatan

Re: Should we face women or not?Because 24 Aug 2017 08:44 #319259

  • robfloyd
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For me, it means that I have to know how to live in this world which includes women in revealing dress. I exercise Shmirat Einayim by looking down, looking up, examining my hands, telling myself that this is a temporary thing which will fade away from my mind in 5 seconds, etc. I am an addict, so I don't try to look directly at women and tell myself that I can take it.

Re: Should we face women or not?Because 28 Aug 2017 01:14 #319396

  • Unknowngye
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Perhaps there is a misunderstanding here. What I meant was that not looking at all could sometimes be an escape and not actually facing the situation head on. So yes I am doing a mitzvah but seemingly I'm not clearing my body (unless the side effect of mitzvos is to purify the body, I'll let you know when I know Lol Hatorah Kula backwards)

Re: Should we face women or not?Because 28 Aug 2017 01:24 #319397

  • gevura shebyesod
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There's a big difference between "seeing" and "looking". You're right that we can't escape reality and live in a cave where we will never see the people who trigger us. In the real world they will always be there, and we need to learn to see them when necessary but to ignore the effect it may have on us. But that is a far cry from looking deliberately "to see whether I can take it".
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: Should we face women or not?Because 29 Aug 2017 02:06 #319458

  • Unknowngye
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Of course i never meant to intentionally gaze. My intention was to say not to keep my head down 24/7
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