I'm speechless. I don't know where to start. I haven't been here since 2012, and a lot has changed. I've been having trouble the past couple of years. I was doing great a couple of years ago. I think I even got to Day 100. I'm embarrassed to say that today is Day 0. I haven't been able to get past Day 7. I decided that I would  start posting here because it helped then why not help now. I will do this.
Chaim

Welcome back,

It should be B'hatzlachah

iwilldothis wrote on 05 Feb 2017 21:08:

Do you need a speechwriter?
lots of aspiring editors around here 

Welcome! (back)

Keep on postin'!

The first few of days are easy, but I will post anyways so I get momentum. 
Day 2

iwilldothis wrote on 07 Feb 2017 00:06:

White knuckling I did till joining gye. The first few days of whiteknuckling are easy, till they snap c'v or the filter snaps which is what usually happened with me

Yeah, I find each day an independent battle. Don't ride on your previous victories. One misdirected missile's all it takes. 

Guess that's the concept of One Day at a Time

Day 3. 
Markz got me thinking on what my plan is.
I have two reasons why I feel a need to act out:

1. I'm bored
2. I'm stressed

So for the boredom, I can read a book on my free time(This might even help with the stress)
or I can learn Chumash.
For the stress, I used to meditate(sit down and just be) for a few minutes and it calmed me down. I can start doing that again at nights. It also helps me be productive so that would help the boredom.

Welcome back. You're in the right place.

First of all please take time to read through the GYE handbook.  No two people are the same, everyone has a slightly different set of circumstances, but we all share this problem and since we share the problem we can share the solution too. The book is written in a general way so it can apply to everyone. I found it helpful to really think about what the book was saying and how it applied to me and my own life.

This is a very common problem nowadays, you're far from the only one to deal with it. The word addict gets thrown around quite a lot, but most people who struggle with this issue are not addicts, just normal people with a normal yetzer hora. Which is good. Some people have come to realise that they really are addicts because their situation got gradually worse and worse despite working on it. When I say worse I mean, in frequency, severity or just feeling worse after every slip. If that is the case we may need more than GYE, which most people find to be therapy or SA or both. But I wouldn't jump to that conclusion about you. Many people have overcome this challenge right here on GYE using the tools in the handbook.

I just want to point out that lots of people get bored but don't act out. Lots of people get stressed but don't act out. I think you wrote that these are "reasons" why you act out, instead of "triggers" that lead to acting out. Avoiding triggers alone might not be the long-term solution you are looking for.

So stick around. Keep posting, keep reading and keep on trucking.

Stress 'n Boredom.

For me, boredom brings stress. How can I be bored when I'm in so much debt? I should be fighting all day! Enter stress etc.

I commend you, but I warn you too. I find acting out a much pleasurable activity than reading or Chumash. And either one will break my boredom. It's a substitute, yes, but with low resolve, it'll eat you alive.

I was struggling today. I told myself I would look at posts before I give in. I was trying to figuring out why I want to stop. Why do I want to stop?
Reason 1: I want a clear mind during the day. When I fall, my head gets heavy and it's hard for me to function. 
Reason 2: Hashem wants me to stop. He has done so much for me, why should I not listen to Him.
I want Reason 2 to sink in more because I think that's what the goal in life is to love Hashem and one way to show that is to listen to what He says. 
I don't know why it is. But just writing this down, helps me before I even post this.

Day 7

Boredom?

I suggest reading, or watching an informative documentary, or visiting/phonin a friend, or helping out an old person, or taking up learning an instrument/painting etc.

stress?

I suffer from it.
Walking helps me for sure.
Reading a novel can help too, or even a factual book about a place different from where you live...something to alter the perspective.
Cleaning or decorating useful too.

iwilldothis wrote on 12 Feb 2017 16:58:

Reason two.
 Hashem loves us and put us here to get the most pleasure possible. (Source - Ramchal?) Acting it may feel good, but whatever pleasure it gives, if Hashem doesn't want us to do that, it's because it will take away from the ultimate pleasure. What is the ultimate pleasure? Connecting to Hashem. We can connect and if we succeed in connecting even the smallest level, it's feels great. I've definitely connected on a low level and it's a great feeling. But acting out is more pleasure. Sometimes. But to compare. The smallest amount of pleasure when I act out (if let's say it didn't go "so well", but I still acted out) doesn't feel that good on a scale of 1 - 10: 0.5, maybe a 1. Compared to that slight connection to Hashem, - where I feel strong and confident because Hashem is so incredible - on a scale of 1 - 10: 3 or 4. So I need to understand that connecting to our Father, it's like building a muscle. The ultimate pleasure from acting out, it will never come close to the pleasure from the ultimate connection to Hashem.

/EndRant

So a few days ago, I decided that if the urge gets bad I'll just go to sleep and not touch any electronics. It worked so far. Now I keep myself busy with other things like work and just reading a book. I got a chavrusa at night. 
I'm also working on my davening. Just going to shut and really reading the words and understanding what I'm saying. It helped me a lot with this struggle. I like the "feeling" of connecting to Hashem. 
I'm thankful to Hashem that I made it this far.
Day 15.

Mazeltov! 15 days is a big stretch.

I'd assume a night seder chavrusa is a great idea. KOMT