Hi everyone,

I'm new here so hello everyone. 


Here is my question that bothers me very much and I would appreciate if anyone can shed some light. 

I would not consider myself an addict and I don't have an urgency to watch porn etc. I have a basic phone with no Internet access bh and I'm my own boss with my own office and I have a filter on my pc. But I have many friends that they don't have a filter on there devices and when I ask them if they ever watch not appropriate stuff their answer is no (I assume if they would watch they would tell me) so I had to get another pc for me and I didn't see it so important  to put a filter on it and within 2 weeks I was watching inappropriate stuff so my question is why do I have such a weakness that I can't control myself? ???? While other people can

Welcome,

Can you control yourself, or can't you?

Welcome

Do you have Ruach Hakodesh???

Because I am working on a nice piece to explain the whole topic, and it's not gonna go to print on my thread "Mark of Torah" till I have it all clear (the perfectionist that I am)

But since you asked I'll quote the first paragraph from that incomplete lecture, here goes

-------------------

I viewed porn. Am I normal??
We all have a lust beast inside us of various viciousness - Theres at least 2 general groups;
1) Small growl: When confronted with porn, the beast attacks
2) Huge growl: When anywhere the beast attacks

Who has the first beast? All men, without exception
(There's a negligible minority that is an exception)

There was a Sage called Reb Amram Chasida ("Pious Amram") in the Gemara (kiddushin 81), that was normal like this. When he was alone with some eye catching women his beast gave him unnatural adrenaline to access them, until he defeated the beast with a "partner call". R Meir too...





btw your friends - some may not be honest on this, and some not have come across porn, like yourself hadn't

Keep on Trucking, and if you have a moment pls read pg of my story

YOU ARE A TRUE JEW

I can control myself,  however when I have Internet access without a filter after a while I'll end up looking at inappropriate stuff. 

I can have access to computers without filter but I don't want too, but when I have my own computer without a filter after a while - a few days- I'll be...

Want to be a true jew wrote on 09 Mar 2016 04:44:

ummmm....you may wanna read the above again.

b'hatzlachah

Hi,
This is a question that I also struggle with. Is everyone like me or not. But I finally realized that it really doesn't matter what everyone else is. I know what I have to do to stay healthy and I will keep on doing it. I'd like to believe that I am normal even though my sponsor wants me to believe that I have a disease/addiction. We agreed to disagree as long as I know what I need to do to say healthy.
I hope you will also do whatever it takes to be healthy.

cordnoy wrote on 09 Mar 2016 10:53:

Hello amd welcome. 
What i think Cordnoy is pointing out, is that there seems to be a contradiction in your posts. Maybe you're not clear yourself, but you write that you can control yourself and don't have a watching problem, and then you write that you keep on falling and looking.
Now, that doesnt nessacerly mean that you are an addict and need to rush to the nearest sa meeting, but i do think that you should seriously think about the situation. Were they really random slips? Are there things that you can be doing that will protect you in the future?
There are endless diffrent levals of p--n addictions. 
Hatzlacha
sg
(Btw, i agree that there is a good chance that a friend wouldnt admit that he has a problem too even though you asked. Doesnt mean he does, but they might.)

Welcome!

I agree with what everyone has said above.  As we get to know you better, we'll be able to make better recommendations, more related to your specific issues.  So don't be discouraged if we're missing anything; it's a process for both of us.

Also, idle time is a nasty bugger when it comes to lustful yearnings.  Whether or not you're an addict, having free time, an imagination, and a male libido, means you're in the temptation zone to at least some degree.  I find that it helps to fill your schedule with people and non-enticing activities.

You seem to be asking whether or not you're an addict.  GYE delineates very specific parameters for making that assessment.  Check out the information on the GYE Program tab on the top of the screen.  You're basically not going to find any shades of gray in this; the categories are very specific.  Answer everything honestly -- that is KEY -- and work from there.