Working guy,

Once again very well said. I don't know what to say. Its deep but kind of sounds logical. If I could I would double click the thank you button.

Just a thought, should I change my name to something like makeWDgreatagain??? What do the anti trump guys think of that name???

Ok so many of you spoke and I am listening.

Firstly, I am clean for two days. (Although its easier on weekdays than on M shabbos where my "itch" is just much stronger.
The willpower while not there yet has been streghnthening partly due to many pointing out how silly I sound when I think only half of my lust in unmanageable while the other is OK. As if you can somehow draw a line down the middle?
 Here is my plan starting today,
1) Stop talking and spend 5 minutes on Cords steps 4 &5. Whether I get why I am doing it or not what do I loose
2)distractions when going to sleep
3) Back to hampil from a siddur (most of hampil is a tefila not to sin during the night)
4) I have been guilty of just checking up a friends  latest(male not female) post on a hot topic on facebook. That's a bad move because then you start checking out other posts and profiles as well. so no more of that
5) When the tavia comes remind myself of how low and dangerous I have fallen into in the past. Additionally, i know of a few people (some young) that were nifter suddenly over the past year. We all don't know when the time comes. Its especially important during lust because my rational is always Ok one day I'll get rid of it but let me enjoy it now. If I think to myself who knows if today is not the last then ....
(i used this step 5 last nite) 

Of course none of these steps are fool proof but i gotto start somewhere.

Great going,  refreshing post

waydown wrote on 24 Feb 2016 16:48:





Never realized he was the author, but I guess it does explain why his call is so good.

clean for three days.

I must profess though I did not do all steps outlined in that prior post. I really should make sure to at-least start with that.

One more point, I have no clue how long it will last (Rembember M shabbos is a tough one) But just pushing its for one or two days helps you build up will power as you see it can be done. So maybe for one who lacks will power the yesod is Ok lets not talk about quitting but do you have the will power to just try it for one night? (Is that the idea of one day at a time? I am not sure)

I do need some help as this time it was partly due to work pressure that I am having hard tie building up whatever you wanna call it (will power etc..). I am beginning to fall again and am posting this post with the hope of stopping anything from further progressing.

It should be with hatzlachah.

If you wanna talk, email me first and we will arrange.

Power to ya for bringing bit up "wayup", take cords up on his offer, he'll boost you, 

Hashem yaazor

Ps i schnorr all my willpower (which aint much) from the fine charitable fellows here.

 

Yesod wrote:

Yesod, I may sort of agree with your sentiments, but then, it's a 2 way street - we schnorr from you!!!!!

markz wrote on 03 Mar 2016 02:06:

Schnorr at will, whatever floats your truck 

Workingguy wrote on 23 Feb 2016 18:25:
I've been kinda busy, so the last time I checked out this thread was 115 posts ago. I didn't read them all, but I browsed a bit and found this one. I'm not sure if I'm repeating something said already, but here goes....

I remember Rabbi Akiva Tatz saying something to the effect that the biggest givers are often the biggest takers. (the rest of the post is not from Rabbi Tatz)

Sometimes people like the feeling of giving. Giving in order to get. (not necessarily consciously).

Sometimes people give for reasons of people pleasing because they don't feel good about themselves.

Even if one does a chessed anonymously, it may be because he feels inferior or low. The chessed, done anonymously, says loud and clear "I must be a tzaddik, no one even knows about it". One of the al chets is for "gaavah hanelemes" (I can't recall which one specifically right now). Not outward gaavah, but a "feeling" of superiority.

I don't know if any of this applies, but I do know "ain adam roeh nigei atzmo". We paint our actions in a positive light. If a guy is an early riser and gets to shacharis on time, he thinks that "HE" has kavod for Hashem, so he gets up early. The other guy - does not. Really, it's nothing more than his nature.

There is a lot of depth to the subconscous motivations for all our actions. Even great people have misjudged their motivations. Humility is the only tool to uncover them (at least being humble enough to trust another person who can see more clearly). Otherwise, we are trapped in self-deception, and no one can help us.

As if you didn't have enough already, I just provided more food for thought. Not looking to get into any debates.

Have a good Shabbos!