Hi All,

This is my first time posting at GYE.

I am newly religious and want to clean up my act in the lust department, i.e. pgam habrit. I have seen enough porn in my life that my brain can run loops of porn movies in my head, namely my imagination is vivid enough that I don't need the internet to excite myself to the point of falling. I have never discussed this with my wife and frankly she is not as religious as I am (also from non-religious background). I do not want to give her the ABCs yet of the benefits of achieving sexual purity. My wife does go to the mikva (something new) and regardless of whether she is available or not or in the mood, I physically need to have a "release" every 5-7 days as a horniness wave hits me. When this wave hits, all I think about obsessively is a release. Like a vortex it pulls me in. Normally before I was religious, I would MB in the most mechanical way to get rid of the wave, enjoy it, and go back to work. If my wife is tahora, all the better. Today I feel like I am sinning and don't enjoy it once in the way when I was chilloni.

It appears my body is physically addicted to having a release every 5-7 days. I have read in medical journals or magazines dealing with men's health that the teststerone levels spike in this period. Whatever it is, I have not succeeded in getting through it without a release whether proper or improper. I do not wish to become a nazir. If my wife wants relations, I certainly will give it to her in the proper way, however, are there any tips for reduce the horniness wave that seems to hit every 5-7 days. I am tired of being a slave to this.

Thanks.

Welcome,

i wish i could help.
Mine hits me every other hour.
I have found medical journals and books that say i am addicted to this behavior.
Tips?
that's why we are here.

b'hatzlachah

Welcome. Glad you came on the forum. So many of us have found solace and true life altering positive change here. I wish you the same.

How exciting that you embraced your Judaism even though you did not grow up that way. Clearly you are one who yearns to follow the truth and in turn follow it and cling to it.

Thank YOU for posting here on the forum!

WELCOME! I'm not sure what to say other than to stay busy. Can you ever make it past 5-7 days? How?

Welcome.

Thanks guys for the shot of encouragement and the welcomes to GYE.

Fighting the YH beast is no easy task. As far as gibbor120's question about getting through more than 5-7 days, I think I got to 10 days once and then fell, but that is after being focused 24 hours a day on not falling when your body wants the release. The amount of energy expended to not fall is so huge that it becomes impossible for me to function in other areas of life due to the distractions, such as doing my work. Do you all experience this, too?

hi jk61

first of all, know that you have special zchut because your a baal teshuva , and that means that H gets special Nachas from you.

other then that, try to make yourself a exercise routine, and generally stay busy.

when an impure thought strikes you, just inmedietly think of something else.

hope it helps

beatzalcha raba tzadik

What you describe is familiar to us all I think. The goal is to get to a place where we are not struggling. Once we struggle, it is just a matter of time until we fall. If we can learn to live in a healthy way, we will not have the struggle (as much). That is what the 12 steps are about in a nutshell. Learning to live right. Let go of fear, resentment, anger. Trust G-d...

jk61 wrote:


generally speakin'...if it's a big struggle, it's a sign that we might not be doin' the best method available to us.....not always, but many times.

b'hatzlachah