Has anyone else had to deal with impulsive sexual thoughts like what I go through? For example, I'll be reading about someone or talking to someone, man or female, and a thought will enter my head that deals with that person and something I've seen in porn. I know its the YH and I shouldn't focus on it. I guess my question is, does it go away as you reduce the farther away you get from viewing porn?

Everyone has silly thoughts that pop into their minds. Just recognize them as such and let go of them.

I do relate, very much actually.

Just this past shabbos I was looking at someone and wondering how he copes in the bedroom......it is certainly less common and less severe the more removed I am from lust.

As skep wrote, they are jsut thoughts, and we need to remember not to define ourselves by our thoughts. It is annoying, I know, but it's the fact, we are not our [subconsious] thoughts that pop up without our direct will.

KOT BRO!!! Just KOMT!!!

Pidaini wrote:


Just wanted to add that while we are not held responsible for those annoying thoughts that pop up, we need to do our part in ignoring and not dwelling on them. As the sforim explain the possuk:
ולא תתורו אחרי לבבכם ואחרי עיניכם
You shall not stray 'after' your hearts and 'after' your eyes.
i.e. the involuntary thought, or the involuntry look is not your fault, but be careful not to keep thinking or looking afterwards.

Hatzlacha

MT

Indeed, the first thought or first moment we see something is not what destroys us. It is our decision to think or look again. That extra thought or look is what ingrains the bad behavior and the focus on that which is bad for us. Good luck - keep on working at it!

Machshovo Tova wrote:


That's why it says אחרי and not אחר. See Rashi at the beginning of Parshas ראה:
כל מקום שנאמר אחרי, מופלג הוא

and don't forget: after you succeeded in avoiding that extra look, offer a brief prayer to God for providing you with the strength for that moment to overcome.

This will strengthen your resolve for the next time.

b'hatzlachah

It definitely gets easier the further you are removed from improper images.
But it may get harder before it gets easier - just be prepared.
Just it is our job not to allow these thoughts to dwell at all.
There are various methods - digging toes into the ground, going for a brisk walk, focusing on proper things, mediating on the 13 middos, and of course davening to Hashem. This is what has helped me.

Thinking of you

This is just the fight for live.
Everyone trying to find "the way".
Fighting with the world, fighting and struggling with ourselves.
This is a part of the human existence in this world, the pure truth.
Always looking for the "right way", "the right thought", "the right behaviour".
We are always "on the fight".

Welcome Pomodoro!!!

Don't be a stranger, what's your story?

Maybe start a thread in the "introduce yourself", looking forward to get to know you!!