Wow. The thread grew several pages since I last checked.. And has the name changed to "Harry's daughter" yet?  ;D

Everyone had amazing pts. (Including Guard  :D)

Was just TrYiNg to show both sides of the coin. We all have our nisyonos. We need to work on them and understand that we can't change others. Only ourselves.

RATM, Kanesher ---RIGHT ON

I think the title is triggering. Let's change it to "Harry's Shvigger". I think that should solve the problem-  ;D

:D :D

We can't change the title all the time so call it Harry's thingybob whatsitcalled  and let everybody think what they want.

the most apropriate would be goin with Bardsy:

Harry's Problem

But that would be the opposite of what they are all saying here.

Its not his problem but mine...

i think what bards is saying is that you both have probelm, you and harry but theyre different problems...you have a lusting problem....period...pause...and then...harry has a problem that his little missus is not getting enough attention/too vain, etc...but harrys wife is harrys problem and ratms addiction is ratms problem...

Lets forget about who's problem it is and focus on the solution....
because all the while I'm thinking about Harry's ..... instead about thinking about giving my life to Hashem and accepting what he gives me 

NAT THAT

"IS" WHAT WE ARE SAYING HERE!!

AS RATM SAID YSTERDAY

CHAVA (EVE) ADAMS WIFE AND ADAM TOOK THE BLAME GAME ROUTE

WE NEED TO SAY

IT MAKES NO DIFFERRENCE TO ME WHAT SHE IS OR WHAT SHE IS UP TO

ITS NOT MINE AND

BOOM! FUGGEDABOUTIT!!!

KEEP BUSY KEEP ON TRUCKIN!!!!

b

Dov,
Your post gets my haskama.
(that was my joke of the day... Am I cured of BDS?

BTW, I've been noticing your jokes all over the place. Check with Bardy, but perhaps you no longer have BDS?

OK. At the expense of starting up this whole thing again, I'd like to ask a question. Just out of curiousity. Not trying to fix anything. But being curious (that of course is the ticket to death in today's world), can someone explain to me:
I understand that a woman wants to dress nice, for her own reasons. She does not have enticement in mind. She just likes likes looking good, sort of a chok without any reason (we learn this when we get married and they start throwing out our best ties and shirts etc that we have being treasuring for 10 years).

But why do that have to wear the skirts short? Can't a skirt look good a  little longer?
Is there a reason, other than to entice men, to wear shorter skirts?

Now, don't ask me why 3 inches of flesh and bone one way or the other should interest men. Can't explain it.

My question is simply doesn't it mean that their intention is to have (other :D) men stare at them?

k

WHEN YOU CAN EXPLAIN WHY PEOPLE DRINK WOODFORD OR EAT SUSHI OR RFEFER MATJAS HERRING ETC ETC

KUTAN KUTAN THE PATH TEL GEHELLOM IS PAVED BY WONDERING ABOUT THOSE 3 INCHES

BEEN THERE DONE THAT

CAN WE ALL IGNORE HARRY AND HARRIETTE FOR A WHILE?

b

My views on this are there are several fundamental misunderstandings here:

1.  My belief is that women don't dress not znenuah to be micshal you or me.  Women dress the way they do for one of several reasons.  First and foremost they want to look nice for themselves.  They base what looks nice on the same things you and I do - other people, media, etc.  Therefore what is nice, what is acceptable varies from community to community around the world, by yidden, by goyim, lehavdil.  Neshomo or not some things are universal. What is considered tznius follows the same idea - i.e. changes from community to community.

2.  Don't flatter yourselves, gentlemen, when Mrs Cohen got dressed this morning and put on a shorter skirt than you feel comfortable seeing (those three inches referred to above) she didn't give a moment's thought to any of you.  She might have thought about what everyone else in street would be wearing, but you chaps were not even at the back of her mind.

3.  If Mrs Cohen thought of attracting anyone it was probably her husband.  If she dresses attractively it is because she is worried that Mr Cohen might be checking out one of the other ladies on the street so she wants to keep up with them.

My biggest concern is that throughout this all there seems to be a lack of taking responsibility for your own actions and thoughts.  Its not my fault its their's for being so immodest sounds too much like "its her fault that she was raped because she was dressed provocatively".

Focus on yourselves.  Its your (our) problem not theirs.

I want to add that we have a WARPED prospection of the world. We take things way out of context. We see a woman and this takes over our world view. We have a problem. Yes tzienous needs to be better but we have a big issue to deal with.

Help Wanted wrote on 14 Oct 2009 23:25:



We do need to focus on ourselves.  But you can't deny that there is a Lav of Lifnei Iveir in the Torah.

Kedusha wrote on 15 Oct 2009 03:57:


Agreed, but is the point of this site to explore other peoples shortcomings in Lifnei Iveir or is the purpose of the site, as well as the intentions of those who blog here, to work and grow in recovery?