Welcome, Guest
Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: 14 days!! 5795 Views

Re: 14 days!! 28 Mar 2024 18:46 #410884

funbuchur wrote on 28 Mar 2024 17:13:
Day 55
I keep on thinking to myself if I didn’t have a filter no chance I would be clean, maybe 3 days. Am I accomplishing anything. 

I get your question, funbucher. I think about it myself. Not necessarily with the filter, but everything. The texts, the posts, and just being on GYE. Will I need all of these tools forever? It is certainly better than the alternative of having falls. Not only that, but--from a religious perspective--aren't we supposed to use whatever tools are at our disposal to be the people who we ought to be?

Re: 14 days!! 29 Mar 2024 00:03 #410909

  • yitzchokm
  • Current streak: 412 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 678
There is no reason to put ourselves into a lion's den. Having a filter so we don't have the chance to fall is a major breakthrough. It is also important to ask ourselves what we would do if we were alone in a room with an unfiltered device because it will probably happen at some point. We should be able to build the determination not to use the device at all and to leave the house if necessary. This can be accomplished through regularly reading The Battle of the Generation.

We can work on this by refusing to look at a YouTube video someone tries showing us because we don't watch YouTube. We can refuse to use unfiltered devices when we are in someone else's house because we don't use unfiltered devices. This will train us to stay away from an unfiltered device when we happen to be alone with one.

Your end goal should be to be able to refrain from using unfiltered devices, and to be able to firmly say "I don't do that", however, you shouldn't be overly concerned if you aren't holding there yet, to the extent that you feel like you haven't accomplished anything, because the truth is that there is a lot that you accomplished and you are a work in progress. The Yetzer Hora knows that he has a harder time getting us to sin if we feel good about ourselves, so he sometimes tries to minimize our success and lower our self-esteem by telling us that there is so much more that we still haven't achieved. The way to fight this is by looking back to the place where we were holding when we first began our journey and celebrating how far we have come, while at the same time being humble and acknowledging our shortcomings and that we have more work left to do.

I suggest that you read Chapters 36-41 of The Battle of the Generation which are on the Daily Dose schedule for this month and address your concern in great detail.
Last Edit: 29 Mar 2024 00:27 by yitzchokm.

Re: 14 days!! 29 Mar 2024 13:06 #410940

  • lionking
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 966
  • Karma: 102
yitzchokm wrote on 29 Mar 2024 00:03:
There is no reason to put ourselves into a lion's den. 
....

If you ever decide to enter a lion's den, please let me know, I will graciously host you!
My email address is: growinghigher613@gmail.com

Re: 14 days!! 31 Mar 2024 16:34 #411032

  • funbuchur
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 133
  • Karma: 12
Day 58 
you guys are so right, I always had a filter in the past and always found a way to get it unlocked for a bit or get a app on that had a hole. Now one of my things which I don’t do is I don’t look for holes and if I get that curiousness maybe this will work I stop it before I try to go there. 
57 days without using. 

Re: 14 days!! 31 Mar 2024 17:30 #411035

  • notezy
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 497
  • Karma: 12
Good to hear the news keep going!
"Excuses are the tools of incompetence" -My Friends Friend. 

"Change will lead to insight far more often than insight will lead to change" -Milton H. Erickson

Re: 14 days!! 02 Apr 2024 17:16 #411128

  • funbuchur
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 133
  • Karma: 12
Day 60 
Had big slip yesterday. 
But we’re here

Re: 14 days!! 02 Apr 2024 18:06 #411132

  • notezy
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 497
  • Karma: 12
2/3 
"Excuses are the tools of incompetence" -My Friends Friend. 

"Change will lead to insight far more often than insight will lead to change" -Milton H. Erickson

Re: 14 days!! 02 Apr 2024 21:25 #411142

  • JARES90
  • OFFLINE
  • Senior Boarder
  • Posts: 77
  • Karma: 1
Keep going, keep your head up

Re: 14 days!! 04 Apr 2024 17:13 #411279

  • funbuchur
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 133
  • Karma: 12
Day 62
Don’t wanna get complacent. 

Re: 14 days!! 05 Apr 2024 11:01 #411315

  • Hashem Help Me
  • Current streak: 2918 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4058
You asked a few times about where you would be holding if you didn't have a filter - and therefore is what you are doing now really praiseworthy. It is a commonly asked question - coming straight from the Satan that wishes to demoralize us. For starters - were our great grandparents really clean if they lived in shtetlach with minor tznius triggers? Should they have purposely moved to neighborhoods with prostitutes to see if they are really clean? Does Hashem prefer that we test ourselves unnecessarily? Don't we daven every day "v'lo li'yedei nisayon"? Does anyone put treife candies in their pantry and teach their children to choose well and only take the kosher stuff? Do we carry hammers in our hands on Shabbos, and just remember not to knock in a nail, or did Chazal declare muktze because human nature is that we will slip?

It is assumed that all rabbonim from all kehillos are in full agreement that if the Anshei Knesses HaGedola was around today there would be an official gezeira regarding filters (with all the details/exceptions when and where etc, just like hilchos muktze). Hashem wants us to protect ourselves, our children, and our communities. And of course, He wants us to stay clean in situations of nisayon as well. Be proud of what you are doing - it is the ratzon Hashem to the tee. Continued hatzlocha buddy! Hug!
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: 14 days!! 05 Apr 2024 21:23 #411342

  • funbuchur
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 133
  • Karma: 12
Day 63 
just fell. Strongest urges I had in forever. My first thought is defeat he finally beat me. Ugh. Secondly right when it was over I started thinking why do I have such urges for this it’s just screenplay and gross. I know the yetzer hara is telling me to feel defeated but I don’t know how to feel accomplished even tho I had such a good two months…. It vey here we go 
Day 1….
What will be different… need to figure this out 

Re: 14 days!! 07 Apr 2024 04:12 #411353

  • notezy
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 497
  • Karma: 12
After a fall is not the time to consider if you accomplished or not your self worth probable just took a nose dive off a cliff you're not going to be able to look at the bigger picture objectively.

"What will be different and need to figure this out" 
My guess is your feeling like there is a big thing blocking your path somthing that was there from day 1. But its more like the YH grew to give you a big test of sorts.
What I am trying to say is their is probably less change that needs to happen than you think. 
"Excuses are the tools of incompetence" -My Friends Friend. 

"Change will lead to insight far more often than insight will lead to change" -Milton H. Erickson

Re: 14 days!! 07 Apr 2024 04:52 #411355

  • Hashem Help Me
  • Current streak: 2918 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4058
As you put on the bandages for the scrapes you received while falling into the ditch, enjoy the beautiful serene view and invigorating fresh air from 63 days up the mountain. And when you're ready, grab the walking stick and continue climbing...
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: 14 days!! 07 Apr 2024 16:54 #411368

  • funbuchur
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 133
  • Karma: 12
Day 2 
still going. Trying to Work up and better each day 

Re: 14 days!! 07 Apr 2024 23:02 #411378

  • eraygrand
  • Current streak: 581 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 95
  • Karma: 10
Listen to today's וימאן. If you are not already doing it there is a daily Whatsapp.
Time to create page: 0.55 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes