"Shabbos is coming, we're so happy...shout it to the world, SHABBOS!!!"

Oh, and we are so nervous.

So excited, becaus it is my first week working with someone (HHM) to nix this obsession. I cant believe its been a week!!!
And I am oh, so nervous because nights are the hardest. I've been listening to shuirum to fall asleep, so my mind stays where it belongs. The maaleh of listening vs a book, I can fall asleep listening to something. Can't fall asleep reading.
Hopefully a lchaim or two at the Friday night suedah will be helpful.

Looking forward to a clean Shabbos!!!

Good Shabbos to all my GYE Chaverim. Thinking about you,  and davening for you!

A Gut Shabbos,

WhyWatch 

Can I say BH Shabbos is over? Either way BH we made it through! I was nervous about Friday night, going to sleep without listening to something to distract myself, but a gift from Hashem, I pretty much fell asleep right away.
The hard part was actually Shabbos day. I tried resting but my mind was fighting me. So I read the paper. Once I was finished,  I had nothing to distract myself, and I found myself combating pornographic thoughts an entire shabbos day. BH I was victorious, but it was really stressful. If you have any tips on how to distract yourself on Shabbos, so it's less of a fight, let me know please!!!

A Gut Voch! 

whywatch wrote on 29 Sep 2024 00:50:

Wow so I guess I'm not the only one,
I had the same issue I'm 2 weeks clean with no thoughts but I already know that shabbos is my major cue, and so it was that I woke up this morning and for the first time in 2 weeks I had imaginary movies playing in my head the entire day, every time I closed my eyes {even in middle davening, seuda, nap, etc.} I saw porn scenes playing in my head.
Id also love some advice, but I can say this much, first thing I did moitzei shabbos was text my mentor rabeinu HHM, second thing was listening to a urge surfing audio imagining the porn star as the twigs and leaves swimming along with the waterfall, there was a separation between me and the waterfall so when the twigs and leaves came closer and got bigger it didn't trigger me to strong, than it eventually fell down the waterfall along with the current and completely vanished.

Now I'm not saying that it's not going to come back, but at least there's a separation between me and the waterfall {aka urge} and hopefully it'll help me cope now and serve as a good practice for the coming shabbosim and yomim tovim

Iy"h we'll all get out of this together, hatzlacha and kesuva vachasuma tova

Heroes! Both of you! Staying clean proved that there is no actual need to act out. Make a plan how to be a little more occupied on Shabbos if possible. The good news is that eventually the subconscious gives up....

thank you for your private chat. was definitely a great chizuk to have someone in practically the same situation.
unfortunately i`m still locked out of private chat for another 15 days due to me being new here only 16 days, but feel free to email me at mevakesh247@gmail.com  
looking forward to getting out of this together with all us great brothers here on gye.

ALERT:

I changed my username from WhyWatch to EiyanTov. I felt that why watch has a negative vibe. While Eiyantov is much more focused on positive. So keep following my journey, just under a new name. 

#SameAmazingJourney

#NewBranding

eiyantov wrote on 01 Oct 2024 19:59:

Mazel Tov!

New look. Same great taste.Continued Hatzlacha

awesome name

i for long have a dream to open a "daily joke" thread, i feel that being here because of the pain and the negative dosent give the motivation to stay here, and keep up the fight, VS the positive the "eiyan tov" simcha and humor, keeps you motivated to come back here constantly and keep up (& iy"h win) this greatest best most exciting fight in the world.

what a pitty that im just not a comedian cant come up with a new joke every day.

rebakiva wrote on 01 Oct 2024 21:32:

What's wrong with the 141 pages of this ? Plenty of guaranteed laughs

wow thanks for that link
you see us freshies here dont know our way around yet

The challenge of a Taanis, especially when there is no work. 

Nothing to do, time to kill. Ugh!

Already feeling restless, which is not good. Gonna try to find things to do. 

Praying for an easy day!

I totally agree. Fast days were always very hard for me. Now I found GYE forums!! So many legendary threads to chose from!!! So many tzadikim to read about their journeys!! The biographies art scroll won't publish until the times of משיח!

Ok. So BH I found myself something to do. I built my Sukkah and baked. That took a majority of the afternoon, and removed any urges.

Btw. I haven't been posting everyday where I am holding, as I check in with HHM. But tonight Bezras Hashem will be 15. Half way to 30, and 1/6 to 90! 

15 days feels like yesterday for me. It was a significant milestone for me in changing my mindset. Bh, I hit 90 and here I am, a couple of months after 90.

May your 15 soon morph into 30, 90, and beyond ad meah v’esrim!

Muttel

The question if you could end your addiction or not is not up to you! That is not your focus at all! You're focused and what god wants from you is to try, And not give up try again even after you fell hard, Remember god created you with all your struggles within you, he knows Your background your upbringings and The trauma that's leading to this...

 My dear brother, keep strong.My prayers are with you, Don't give up never ever should you give up because that's exactly what the yh wants you should be doing..
 Don't give in!