chaimoigen wrote on 22 Aug 2024 02:24:

OK,  I admit the huffing and puffing I added for effect. But the other stuff, it was all carefully gathered intelligence.

chaimoigen wrote on 22 Aug 2024 03:28:

Any patent attorney's in the house? I've got a trademark on this for almost 3 years!

minhamayim wrote on 22 Aug 2024 00:00:

A Chasid in a litvish shul can do whatever the hell he wants.....after all he is a CHASID!

Heeling wrote on 22 Aug 2024 15:25:

chosemyshem wrote on 21 Aug 2024 18:28:

Red, please package it nicely and I will come pick it up.

chaimoigen wrote on 22 Aug 2024 03:28:

Reb CO, I loved every word! 
I surely hope that nobody thinks they need to be ready to hang out with 10 friends in order to beat this YH. No, nobody does. And there's no reason to think so. 
On the other hand, I totally understand that for some people talking etc. is really hard. Believe it or not, it was once very hard for me too. There are all types of personalities. I know. But, at the end of the day, friendships are essential to true freedom. Yes, at your pace. Post. PM. Email. Maybe even stop there, if you can create a real friendship like that. But for the vast majority of people, getting past the toxic secrecy, and creating real, deep friendships, this is the way out of hell.
My dear friend YKW, nobody needs 10 friends to get out of this garbage, and maybe even one is enough. I suggest to most people to make 3-4 friends, and talk to one of them once a week. I don't think more is necessary. Those who want more, nu, let them enjoy themselves. 

BUT, I have my own point to make, which I hope the oilam will still listen to. 
Reb CO, you so well pointed out that these friendships are sacred. And the privacy of every person any one of talks to is super sacred. I just have this fear that now that we met en masse, and watched CO choke on his bagel, and shmoozed around until the pallets were delivered, figuring out if vaping is safer than smoking, debating if hugging will get our picture in the Lakewood Scoop under the crime section, there may be a feeling that talking about one guy's issues with others is ok, for we have all met together. Rabbosai, I'll be the first to say that I was on cloud 9 from the whole event. I just hope this old man didn't get IWLR in trouble. And I'll be the first to say that I need to be extra careful that what people share with me is between myself and that person, and just because we share super close friends who discuss seriously super crazy private things, that doesn't allow for any leeway on the privacy. It might be a little hard, but privacy is sacred.

I would add, BH IWLR says he didn't get into too much trouble from our coming. In the future we must be MUCH more careful. If it ever happens that a few guys come to an event, figure out before hand where we'll be meeting. We can enjoy the meeting and all it offers, and still keep all parties involved safe. It's really not a joking matter, for many of us, including myself, have wives that (at least officially) know nothing of our membership here. And it can be devastating for them to find out. 
We made a mistake. And we should never repeat it. We must be more careful.
Loads of love, dearest friends!

Bah. Whats life without taking some risks, Throw caution to the wind. 

BBQ at YKW's place sunday night. send PMs to anyone Yiftach to reserve

redfaced wrote on 23 Aug 2024 03:01:

You’re all welcome to come on over. 

I’m serving leftover scraps from some previous victims. Glatt Kosher, no worries. 

redfaced wrote on 23 Aug 2024 03:01:

No need to PM anyone specific....

eerie wrote on 23 Aug 2024 02:57:

I know one safe place…. Too bad it didn’t work out this time.

yiftach wrote on 23 Aug 2024 03:42:

Exactly what I had in mind by crossing out anyone.....

eerie wrote on 23 Aug 2024 02:43:

Preach it!

I feel like people have casually mentioned in conversation part of a conversation they've had with someone else (not as gossip - something they said and the other person's response or something like that) and I don't know that the other person would want that. At the end of the day, there's a lot of deep personal stuff we share in casual conversation around here and it's all too easy to treat it as casual conversation.

Same goes for identifying information. People have the right to control whom they share their identity or identifying information with and it's not right to share that identifying information with others.

When in doubt, stay quiet.

chosemyshem wrote on 23 Aug 2024 13:40:

I have found the same. It would be good to be extra careful about what we share with each other.
Be careful not to share too much about yourself and what you are going through in all areas of your life. You may come to regret it down the road.  Of course be careful to not share with anyone else what someone else is going through. They may want to share only with you. And be super careful of sharing any identifying details about yourself and about someone else.
The friends I have made here in the past few shorts weeks are real friends from the inside out, but there is still room for caution.

Maskim to every word!

But please! Can we get back on with the party!!!