o'k so how about if I call you?

uri, Pls holy brother! Do something! Call battleworn. You'll be glad you did!
We're all routing for you.
I'll go say todays tehilim especially for u.
Go uri!

Dear Uri,

We're all rooting for you!  Regardless of what happened, we sincerely hope you are doing well. 

The best thing you can do now is to set up Gedarim to help you for the future.  In other words, whatever tripped you up this time, take steps that it doesn't happen again.

Kedusha, check out Uri's thread, the conversation was continued over there.

Thanks, Battleworn (not sure how I was supposed to know that).

Am I about to fall?
I'm not sure that not. Something's cooking...
It'd be a pity if I did, cuz I'm on to my 28th day.

shmilu,

what does it smell like? chicken soup? cholent? maybe potatao kugel?!
ok, seriously..., what's cookin man? speak up... we're here and we're listening...

Your on 28th day? Thats KOACH Kof Ches. How can you fall now. Think of HasheM and you will have koach to fight on. We are here for you!

Not sure.
Only thing I can put my finger on thus far is that today when I come across a pretty harmless news article that mentions a woman, I have this urge to Google Image this woman -- I was b"h able to contain myself thus far -- especially if this woman is portrayed as attractive.
I'm afraid that this might be a precursor to something bigger and badder...

Dear Shmilu,

You should get your filter to block Google Image and other image searches, not to mention Google Video and the like.  The potential for mischief is simply too great.

Don't have a filter, Kedusha.
I only have web access on my mobile phone.

Shmilu wrote on 08 Sep 2009 19:01:


Anyone have any tips for mobile phone filtering?

A few comments:Shmilu wrote on 08 Sep 2009 18:50:
I love being not sure!

You may or may not really know this so I'll "take the risk" and say it anyhow: One of the most precious parts of recovery is the first little shred of openness that you are showing right here. The Google Image thing is something I can't touch at all now. Those thumbnails are torture, as are the associated video thumbnails that come up with YouTube. I tried using them many times, feeling the ensuing lust struggle afterwards until I got the help I needed to quit. And I have quit every day, so far, since then; don't even give the idea the time of day today. Because I deserve better!! Life in every respect is so much easier, too. I have time to "worry" about you, now! ;D ;D

Yeah. Whatever. What matters is that you honestly believe that you deserve better. And you clearly see that "better" surely isn't lust.  Lust stinks, frankly (the before, the during and the after of it).
A caveat: the realization that "acting on our lust stinks" has meaning for us only until we allow our inner life to get even more uncomfortable than acting out makes it. If that happens, we will act out, generally.  And that is what the steps are for, for me.... Nu. That is an addict. It takes one to know one .
We love you, Shmilu and thanks for sharing!
- Dov

hi , i've been in the dumps of tumah for almost a week now.i killed a 27day streak and i can't get back on the road .  I"m funtioning well in my job and as a person . i just don't think  i care enough to stop. i am constantly now on the brink since i messed up b/c my brain says might as well you're not on the chart anyway.But i keep resetting the chart to 0 every other day! i just don't know what i need anymore . maybe i don't feel it's so bad ?  i think i'm just a spoiled baal tayvah. i need to learn self control and patience . anybody got some ideas?

to the hidden tzaddik,
first of all,i want to tell u that i grew up reading stories about you,and that you were a big part of my yiddishe upbringing,so i just want to say thank you.
Regarding your past week,as we say in israel,ze lo beeg deel.
You accomplished an amazing amount the previous month.you did not kill anything.
theres no such thing.
did lou gehrig "kill" his hit streak when he had a game without a hit finally??
a streak is an accomplishment.and yours was a tremendous accomplishment.
someone commented to me yesterday that streaks are meant to be broken.
i was like huh?
then i realized what he meant.
Its called a streak because its limited.
if it was not,it would just be you.
and we do not change so easy.
so you did 27.
and eventually youll do 40.
then 60.
then 90.
then you wont be a sex addict anymore eventually.
GEVALDIG
And this garbage about not caring enough to stop is just that:garbage.
If you did not care enough to stop why on earth are you posting on the 911 thread??!!
The yetzer hara is going nuts.Hes working overtime on you right now cause youre down and these streaks give him heart trouble.He's pretty old (5769 years old to be exact) and he cant handle these shocks like he used to.
So he had a week with a couple falls.
And now youre gonna get back in the game
And hes gonna retreat to the corner when he sees how set you are.
And hes gonna whimper.
so yea.those are my 2 cents (as everyone posts at the end of their replies these days.i guess its an elul thing)
and what u asked about self control and patience?
sorry im the wrong guy to ask.
anyway i hope this is some aid to you rebbe.
kol tuv-uri